I ot-ed till 12.30am just now and the moment I reached home I immediately logged in to internet so that I can find my virtual rubbish dump.
Poor slt, he is becoming the convenient dump for me these days.
But too bad, who ask him to be so nice. *Evil grin*
I was telling him that adl is very guo fen, I am doing one of her project for her which is taking up my full concentration because she expects the finished proposal to be 'fully comprehensive'.
Sometimes I think she percieves the whole world to be like herself, staying alive with a single brain cell. The proposals I am doing ON HER BEHALF is already as comprehensive as it can get, any more and I will be sued for insulting the intelligence of whoever else is reading my proposal.
And my point of 'on her behalf' refers to the fact that I am supposed to be supporting her with autocad drawings, quotations, material samples, my proposed concepts, etc so that she can successfully clinch the sale.
But it is getting TOO obvious that she is getting me to do all the work for her. Okay la, maybe not all, maybe around 95%. She is 5% involved cos she has to allocate work to me.
I can only imagine, she will go "Oh, project xx, ok pass to kanigi; yah, project yy's deadline is tmr morning, ok pass to kanigi; client zz wants the image of our product, shall ask kanigi to email him; I think I want two copies of these documents, I must remember to ask kanigi to zap for me; yah, there is a brochure that I must give client aa at 2pm, later at 1.45 I shall ask kanigi to take cab pia down."
Very stressed leh she, have so many things on hand and all she have to do is to gravitate all the shit to me.
Was saying, I am doing her proposal for her, which is due tomorrow. She then told me that she needs me to do one drawing for her.
I told her I am still working on the first project, and she assure me that this drawing that she needs me to do is a VERY simple 2d and the insertion of a single image.
Fine, I told her I shall do that then, if it is really that small.
She happily told me she will brief me.
(Brief what sai? One simple drawing and one image, what is there to brief?)
I went over to her seat and stood by her seat, expecting it to take less than 10secs.
She told me to take a seat instead.
(Sit down for what? I still need to get back to the first project leh!)
I sat down still, and watch her draw a really simple drawing on paper and pointed out to me that she needs the image at the top of the page.
Then the second image at the centre of the page.
(HUH?! Not one image meh? Ok never mind, dont gey gao. One image or two images dont make a very big difference.)
Then please indicate the price for the products in this range.
(Price? Why suddenly need to include price?)
I asked her if she is going to indicate the prices for me, because it was the first time I am seeing this range of product, and I have no idea of the price.
Usually I would just listen to what she wants and carry on from there. Even if the information she gave me is usually around 30% of the total that I need, I never liked to ask her because her product knowledge is THAT much only. I would source for my means to get the work done, which normally involves asking vnc and getting scolded by him, but I'd rather.
She told me I have to check it out myself.
(Kns! But I thought I would just ren and do it.)
She went on, saying, ok, we've covered point 1, we have point 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10.
($**%^#_$&&E$%)
When she finally finished with her dream, I told her it is impossible to complete looking at how much work that is. She have the cheek to tell me it is only very simple 2d drawings and inserting of pictures!
By the way, it ended up that there was 6 drawings to be drawn, and a total of around 20 15 pictures to be inserted, not to forget I still had to ask around for the price, then filled them in.
And it was already 5.30pm and everyone is getting ready to go!!
I told her I agreed to do it because I thought it is only one single piece. She defended, saying 2d and inserting pictures should be very quick, estimating that I should take around 1 hr at the most.
I looked at her straight in the eye, and told her "Adl, it...still...takes...time..."
She got someone else to do it instead, and told that person to check with me if he has querries. Luckily I had to stay ot, if not how is the person going to finish the work? He immediately forgot adl's instructions and had to check with me on what was it that adl wants.
When I checked with him regarding his progress, I was horrified to realise that adl actually completed a huge part of the work for him by filling in all the prices.
Super not fair. If I had to do it, I had to find the prices myself. If it is someone else who is doing it, she will then be willing to depart the information.
Slt says she is treating me that way because I always show her attitude problem. He said that maybe that is there way to get back to me, by loading me with lots of work with incomplete information, is far easier to cripple me than to start a verbal fight.
Maybe slt is right.
But what can I do? I can only complain and vent my anger, what more can I do?
KNN.
Friday, March 31, 2006
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Bbdc sucks
They really spoilt my day.
I passed my rte! Whoppie for that, for I passed with 94%!!
The last time I took the evaluation a week ago, I passed with 66%. The passing mark is 90%. Quite fucked up imo, cos naturally passing should be 50% mah, where got passing is 90% this kind of crap one.
But suan le, they are the one giving the test, I also lan lan.
Now that I passed, I have to pass my Riding Theory Test within 14days, but the crappy thing is that they only have one single slot avail to take the test on my 14th day, at 9am.
I spoke to three different staff, who unanimously have fucked up service attitudes, whom told me that is the only test date avail. If I fail, then too bad, retake the evaluation!
What kind of answer is that? I just spat 'FINE!!!', shoved the plastic chair out of my way and walked out.
What can I do when the service is so kan pua lousy? Forget it, if I ever want to take 3A or 3C, I will take it at another driving centre.
I will keep studying the books, and with some practical lessons that I am considering to take before 8th, I will have a better chance to pass my test.
Speaking of so, my brother helped me buy my helmet already.
Swee hor. =)
It set me back by $50.00, but it is ok. Now I need a pair of gloves and I am ready to go for my practical lessons.
But because of my work schedule, sometimes it is very hard to arrange any lessons. For the moment I am still not intending to tell too many ppl that I am taking 2b.
Up to know, only 4 + 1 knew, I just told pris the other day over smoking session. I dont want to tell ppl that I am taking the lessons, but if I have to take the lessons after work will mean I have to bring my helmet to work.
Unless I bring a super big bag, big enough to hide the helmet. If not I dont know how to work around this problem?
Or if I bring it, I'll just say I'm hitching a ride after work?
That might work too.. cos most ppl know I have a brother who rides.
Tentatively I'll book for my first lesson next sat, I think I will take half day off on sat to take the lesson. I will prefer my first ever practical lesson to be not rushed and in the day.
Following, I will book for my lessons after work.
Notice I dont mention about subject1 subject2 etc... Because I dont believe I can ever pass one subject in one go, so I might be taking one subject for 3 times or what.
Take half day off also good la, then I can rest properly. The leave can also be justified that way, what is more important than me resting?
I passed my rte! Whoppie for that, for I passed with 94%!!
The last time I took the evaluation a week ago, I passed with 66%. The passing mark is 90%. Quite fucked up imo, cos naturally passing should be 50% mah, where got passing is 90% this kind of crap one.
But suan le, they are the one giving the test, I also lan lan.
Now that I passed, I have to pass my Riding Theory Test within 14days, but the crappy thing is that they only have one single slot avail to take the test on my 14th day, at 9am.
I spoke to three different staff, who unanimously have fucked up service attitudes, whom told me that is the only test date avail. If I fail, then too bad, retake the evaluation!
What kind of answer is that? I just spat 'FINE!!!', shoved the plastic chair out of my way and walked out.
What can I do when the service is so kan pua lousy? Forget it, if I ever want to take 3A or 3C, I will take it at another driving centre.
I will keep studying the books, and with some practical lessons that I am considering to take before 8th, I will have a better chance to pass my test.
Speaking of so, my brother helped me buy my helmet already.Swee hor. =)
It set me back by $50.00, but it is ok. Now I need a pair of gloves and I am ready to go for my practical lessons.
But because of my work schedule, sometimes it is very hard to arrange any lessons. For the moment I am still not intending to tell too many ppl that I am taking 2b.
Up to know, only 4 + 1 knew, I just told pris the other day over smoking session. I dont want to tell ppl that I am taking the lessons, but if I have to take the lessons after work will mean I have to bring my helmet to work.
Unless I bring a super big bag, big enough to hide the helmet. If not I dont know how to work around this problem?
Or if I bring it, I'll just say I'm hitching a ride after work?
That might work too.. cos most ppl know I have a brother who rides.
Tentatively I'll book for my first lesson next sat, I think I will take half day off on sat to take the lesson. I will prefer my first ever practical lesson to be not rushed and in the day.
Following, I will book for my lessons after work.
Notice I dont mention about subject1 subject2 etc... Because I dont believe I can ever pass one subject in one go, so I might be taking one subject for 3 times or what.
Take half day off also good la, then I can rest properly. The leave can also be justified that way, what is more important than me resting?
I wonder
I think I dont even have to wonder, I am going to fail tmr's rte for sure.
That thought sucks.
But I havent study fully, and I had only been reading one of the two books, and not quite memorising.
Dead.
I went for drinking with slt, wilf and en'en just now. As much as I enjoy talking to them, sometimes I feel there is still something missing.
Maybe I am too used to how lao da and andy will crap, so much so that I am very uneasy when we are went silent after running out of topics and everyone just looked away to somewhere distant.
Luckily I am new to this group, so it is easy for me to distract myself and concentrate on the passerby coconut tree or the occasional worm that wriggle across the road.
And you know how paranoid I am, I keep thinking the group doesnt like me and it worries me sometimes. Usually not for long, because I have a pre-tuned mindset and once I think that the rest are not liking me, I will avoid them, hence eventually jeopardising any relationship there might had been.
I am one contradicting person.
(This line itself deserve another post, I'll try to get to it tmr.)
That thought sucks.
But I havent study fully, and I had only been reading one of the two books, and not quite memorising.
Dead.
I went for drinking with slt, wilf and en'en just now. As much as I enjoy talking to them, sometimes I feel there is still something missing.
Maybe I am too used to how lao da and andy will crap, so much so that I am very uneasy when we are went silent after running out of topics and everyone just looked away to somewhere distant.
Luckily I am new to this group, so it is easy for me to distract myself and concentrate on the passerby coconut tree or the occasional worm that wriggle across the road.
And you know how paranoid I am, I keep thinking the group doesnt like me and it worries me sometimes. Usually not for long, because I have a pre-tuned mindset and once I think that the rest are not liking me, I will avoid them, hence eventually jeopardising any relationship there might had been.
I am one contradicting person.
(This line itself deserve another post, I'll try to get to it tmr.)
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Short fused
I am getting increasingly short-tempered these days, which is very hard to achieve I know, given that my temper is already THAT short.
For the second time in a few days, I was the last person to leave the company at night. The last time was last fri, I think I am going to break some new records le, being one of the dua dah ones, staying ot alone.
My mind wandered, definately, as I contemplated the possibility of phantoms appearing. But I am so bored with life that I reckon a phantom might be a good conversation topic in days to come.
But I met with none.
I had to stay to do a stupid project which I am almost doing it solely. I love the way things are now, I am doing the crap, and they are getting the commissions and great appraisals.
I must do something about this, quitting is a plausible move.
Ok, I shant digress that much.
I was saying I was doing ot and I needed to find a price for an item so that I can do a quotation. Because I am the only fucked-up person left in the company at that time, there was no one I could turn to.
There is a file that I know contain the information I needed, but it is not where I last left it. I thought michael might have taken it, given that he is using that file frequently these days, and so I rummage throught his workstation.
No luck.
I looked through many other files that might hold the answer, but done did, and I was getting impatient. I sms-ed kt, because the file that I was looking for belongs to him originally, and I thought he could tell me where he found his answer from, back then.
He told me two places to look, and I apologised to him for bombarding him with questions these two days. It seemed too convenient to let by, because most of the drawings I am doing now are based on the standards he left behind.
I said I am sorry to be piling him with questions, but everyone else looked like they are going to kill me if I ask yet another question, so I can only ask someone who is not within reach. (Haha, lame excuse from a lazy person.)
Slt and michael have to put up with my endless questions and slt is already getting fed up. In return, I am retorting that 赢了,熟了就开始没有礼貌了.
Hahah. He cant win me when it comes to saying this kind of bitchy contents.
Anyway, kt seemed to be pissed by my constant questions, because he replied that "next time condense all your questions into one session and ppl wont be so bothered."
Oops, I think he is talking about himself.
I think I will keep my questions to slt in future. Cos as much as he wants to staple my mouth together, he is still entertaining my questions, save for the fact that he is rolling his eyes more often now.
I kept searching and I couldnt get the answer I need. I decided to try the file cabinet again, as though I believe my guardian angel and put back the file for me in the position that I've left it.
No way, but I suddenly found the file in another location, not in alphabetical order, not in any fucking order at all!
I screamed the loudest CCB I ever managed, snatching the file from that slot and 过肩摔 it against the worktop at the same time.
Ok la, not that exaggerated.
But I did string some expetitives together in praise of finding that file. I fished the information I need and I heeled the file back into its incorrect slot.
I dont understand why I had to be so angry over a lost file. I guess I am angrier at my job than I realised.
*****
I am getting addedly upset at this job. I dunno how long I can hold out.
*****
Pris is considering to quit since her boss is not going to give her her confirmation. I am saddened, but she deserves a better job.
*****
I dunno why am I still alive. While I cabbed home just now after work, I watch the speedometer scaled 110km/hr and I wondered if I will have the luxury to crash. I didnt.
*****
Most ppl are not aware of my dark side. I try not to let that shadow of my past appear, but sometimes why does it seem like I am not in control of my life?
*****
I really feel like taking mc tmr, but I've got work to do. Maybe I should take mc on wed and go for a karaoke session. Or maybe I should take one next monday. I dunno for now. When is the next public holiday coming?
*****
I've never admit to anyone before, but one reason why I am learning to ride a bike is because I want to remember how it felt like to treasure life.
*****
Slt is leaving the job and because he had always been the 'boss' of the team, it felt remotely like this group is falling apart. Luckily we stay quite close, so there is still a high chance of me and en'en meeting him for dinner.
*****
I've been sleeping extremely long hours these weekends but I am still feeling lethargic. I dunno what kind of doctor can cure me.
For the second time in a few days, I was the last person to leave the company at night. The last time was last fri, I think I am going to break some new records le, being one of the dua dah ones, staying ot alone.
My mind wandered, definately, as I contemplated the possibility of phantoms appearing. But I am so bored with life that I reckon a phantom might be a good conversation topic in days to come.
But I met with none.
I had to stay to do a stupid project which I am almost doing it solely. I love the way things are now, I am doing the crap, and they are getting the commissions and great appraisals.
I must do something about this, quitting is a plausible move.
Ok, I shant digress that much.
I was saying I was doing ot and I needed to find a price for an item so that I can do a quotation. Because I am the only fucked-up person left in the company at that time, there was no one I could turn to.
There is a file that I know contain the information I needed, but it is not where I last left it. I thought michael might have taken it, given that he is using that file frequently these days, and so I rummage throught his workstation.
No luck.
I looked through many other files that might hold the answer, but done did, and I was getting impatient. I sms-ed kt, because the file that I was looking for belongs to him originally, and I thought he could tell me where he found his answer from, back then.
He told me two places to look, and I apologised to him for bombarding him with questions these two days. It seemed too convenient to let by, because most of the drawings I am doing now are based on the standards he left behind.
I said I am sorry to be piling him with questions, but everyone else looked like they are going to kill me if I ask yet another question, so I can only ask someone who is not within reach. (Haha, lame excuse from a lazy person.)
Slt and michael have to put up with my endless questions and slt is already getting fed up. In return, I am retorting that 赢了,熟了就开始没有礼貌了.
Hahah. He cant win me when it comes to saying this kind of bitchy contents.
Anyway, kt seemed to be pissed by my constant questions, because he replied that "next time condense all your questions into one session and ppl wont be so bothered."
Oops, I think he is talking about himself.
I think I will keep my questions to slt in future. Cos as much as he wants to staple my mouth together, he is still entertaining my questions, save for the fact that he is rolling his eyes more often now.
I kept searching and I couldnt get the answer I need. I decided to try the file cabinet again, as though I believe my guardian angel and put back the file for me in the position that I've left it.
No way, but I suddenly found the file in another location, not in alphabetical order, not in any fucking order at all!
I screamed the loudest CCB I ever managed, snatching the file from that slot and 过肩摔 it against the worktop at the same time.
Ok la, not that exaggerated.
But I did string some expetitives together in praise of finding that file. I fished the information I need and I heeled the file back into its incorrect slot.
I dont understand why I had to be so angry over a lost file. I guess I am angrier at my job than I realised.
*****
I am getting addedly upset at this job. I dunno how long I can hold out.
*****
Pris is considering to quit since her boss is not going to give her her confirmation. I am saddened, but she deserves a better job.
*****
I dunno why am I still alive. While I cabbed home just now after work, I watch the speedometer scaled 110km/hr and I wondered if I will have the luxury to crash. I didnt.
*****
Most ppl are not aware of my dark side. I try not to let that shadow of my past appear, but sometimes why does it seem like I am not in control of my life?
*****
I really feel like taking mc tmr, but I've got work to do. Maybe I should take mc on wed and go for a karaoke session. Or maybe I should take one next monday. I dunno for now. When is the next public holiday coming?
*****
I've never admit to anyone before, but one reason why I am learning to ride a bike is because I want to remember how it felt like to treasure life.
*****
Slt is leaving the job and because he had always been the 'boss' of the team, it felt remotely like this group is falling apart. Luckily we stay quite close, so there is still a high chance of me and en'en meeting him for dinner.
*****
I've been sleeping extremely long hours these weekends but I am still feeling lethargic. I dunno what kind of doctor can cure me.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
The 4th person who known.
My elder bro is the 4th to know I am currently taking my 2b lessons.
Mashi is the first, followed by da ge, who is inevitable to know if I have to tell mashi cos well, they dont bear secrets.
I just told heng this afternoon, because he is intending to take the lessons as well. I had an in-depth conversation with him, talking to him regarding taking the lessons, and how I had failed my RTE.
Haha.
I had to let my bro know that I am taking the lessons because I need a lot of his help. If I had spoken to him before I went for my RTE, I might not have failed it so badly.
And I also need his advice on what kind of bike to get after I pass, if I am going to get one.
He will be getting my helmet and gloves for me, I am expected to be set back by around $80. But at least I dont have to fret about how to get one, and now that he knows, I can leave the helmet in his room if I have to, and that wont stir up too much suspicions.
There is many things that I do not know about 2b, and I should try to get as much information as I can from someone who already have the license, and save myself from wasting time and money.
Also, I mentioned before that I do not want to tell too many people that I am taking the lessons until I started on my practicals. I am still keeping by that. I will not be telling any ppl specifically that I am taking 2b, but I am prepared to be wounded as I learn, cos I will definately spill and buang.
I am prepared.
I am thinking to go for RTP (Riding Theory Practice) but each practice cost $3.15, I might as well take evaluation directly, and if I fail, I will retake, rather than spending so many $3.15s.
Gambatte ne~!
Mashi is the first, followed by da ge, who is inevitable to know if I have to tell mashi cos well, they dont bear secrets.
I just told heng this afternoon, because he is intending to take the lessons as well. I had an in-depth conversation with him, talking to him regarding taking the lessons, and how I had failed my RTE.
Haha.
I had to let my bro know that I am taking the lessons because I need a lot of his help. If I had spoken to him before I went for my RTE, I might not have failed it so badly.
And I also need his advice on what kind of bike to get after I pass, if I am going to get one.
He will be getting my helmet and gloves for me, I am expected to be set back by around $80. But at least I dont have to fret about how to get one, and now that he knows, I can leave the helmet in his room if I have to, and that wont stir up too much suspicions.
There is many things that I do not know about 2b, and I should try to get as much information as I can from someone who already have the license, and save myself from wasting time and money.
Also, I mentioned before that I do not want to tell too many people that I am taking the lessons until I started on my practicals. I am still keeping by that. I will not be telling any ppl specifically that I am taking 2b, but I am prepared to be wounded as I learn, cos I will definately spill and buang.
I am prepared.
I am thinking to go for RTP (Riding Theory Practice) but each practice cost $3.15, I might as well take evaluation directly, and if I fail, I will retake, rather than spending so many $3.15s.
Gambatte ne~!
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Unsurprisingly, I failed.
I feel a tad angry with myself.
I booked the riding theory evaluation last week but I didnt allocate time to study for the test.
I failed with an amazing low score of 66%, partly because I didnt study, partly because I reached late. My test is scheduled at 2.50pm and I expect me to have very sufficient time because I was working until 1pm only.
But because I was tied up for the whole of yesterday, I couldnt finish vnc's project even up to today. Hence I had to stay a little while to try to complete more of the project.
(I havent finish it, if you are wondering.)
I've booked a re-test for next sat. Now that I know what kind of questions to expect, I should be able to pass the evaluation next week. Now my next worry is, is there a time limit to when I must get my riding theory test passed after I get my RTE passed?
If so, I would have to arrange for the test to be taken after work already. Thurs and fri are usually used for arranging dniu-s with friends, so I will only have mon/tues/wed to take the test!
Stressed!
I booked the riding theory evaluation last week but I didnt allocate time to study for the test.
I failed with an amazing low score of 66%, partly because I didnt study, partly because I reached late. My test is scheduled at 2.50pm and I expect me to have very sufficient time because I was working until 1pm only.
But because I was tied up for the whole of yesterday, I couldnt finish vnc's project even up to today. Hence I had to stay a little while to try to complete more of the project.
(I havent finish it, if you are wondering.)
I've booked a re-test for next sat. Now that I know what kind of questions to expect, I should be able to pass the evaluation next week. Now my next worry is, is there a time limit to when I must get my riding theory test passed after I get my RTE passed?
If so, I would have to arrange for the test to be taken after work already. Thurs and fri are usually used for arranging dniu-s with friends, so I will only have mon/tues/wed to take the test!
Stressed!
Thursday, March 16, 2006
I called it off
I am a bitch sometimes.
Okay, make it most of the time.
I arranged with pris around last wed, that we would be going to sing k today. I cant recall why I decided to arrange a session with her, but I did, and I told her I will be asking along the rest of the group, meaning en'en, slt, ec, jes, jnce and kt.
She's ok, and I just spreaded the message around.
Because jnce and kt doesnt work in the company anymore, so we didnt get to ask them immediately. I asked jnce last fri, and she okay-ed on the spot. I left the job of informing kt to one of the guys.
Monday en'en told me that she have not ask kt, so I told her I will call him. But because she was going to call him for something else anyway, so I lazily pushed the job to her. (Heheh).
Eventually he told her he's on kiv.
On tues, I called jnce to cfm the date. She 爽快-ly said of course. But when I called kt, I practically had to beg cos he is still kiv-ing. I even stoop to new lows when I told him it is never my habit to call ppl to force attendance, I am giving him special 面子.
He still didnt give me an answer, saying will confirm with me the next day.
Come next day, he sms me to tell me he is not going.
By then, the confirmed attendance was only me, pris, en'en, jes and jnce would be the social butterfly for the night cos she has another party going on in another room in the same venue.
Slt first said he cannot be confirmed, we kept forcing him to come. He gave us his word.
Come today. I had a big quarrel with vnc, and I am in a pretty bad mood. En'en told me that slt may not be going already as he is the only confirm male for the night. I immediately contemplated to call off the session by then.
But I remembered that my main purpose was to go karaoke with pris, so I cannot sua dniu like tt. I told en'en nevermind, we would still go ahead.
I'm nursing a scratchy throat since yesterday and I'd already declared that I am probably not going to sing, but rather, sit in a corner with pris and talk to her between her songs.
Then en'en said that slt managed to get kt to go. I was utterly shocked, to say the least. I had kept asking via calls and sms and he insist he cannot make it, then the moment slt asked he said he can make it after all.
I bet he must be having some issues against me, if not why is he doing this?
Ok la, I am always too paranoid and too sensitive. I know, I know.
When pris told me her nose is very blocked, and wanted to postpone the session, I told her to go ahead.
And because my purpose for the session is her, if she is not going, I thought I am not going too.
Also, I dowan to see kt in case I flare up at him.
Also, my throat is not in the state to sing any songs.
Also, I am still in a lousy mood because of the quarrel with vnc.
Actually I was just being a bitch la. I wanted to test jes to see if she would not go if I dont go. But plan backfired.
I told jes that pris and myself are not going for karaoke already, and told her to go ahead with the rest of them. She immediately say ok, she will, "if she never ot".
See, anyhow test also can test out something. Crap one. What if she never ot. If all of us go sing k you think she would still back to do ot?
Weak fib.
I told en'en next that I am not going, and that the rest of them go ahead. She told me 'anything' then went ahead to cancel the session!!
Frankly, bitch here is waiting for them to come and sweet talk me into going cos I had been sweet talking them for the past few days. 没想到 en'en cancelled the session.
Not her fault of course, I too gey kiang already.
I really zek ark one leh. On my whim, I caused the session to be cancelled. But I really didnt expect that to happen. Because, as I told slt, before I join this group they are having fun without me what, so I expect even if I dont go, it would just be a pre-kanigi session lor.
What's wrong with that?
Slt said no lor, cos like I always announce, whenever I go, it is case of star appearance. So if I dont go it would be as fun.
Boy, I enjoy them treating me as their long-term clown.
I told him I am not feeling well enough to sing anyway, so even if I were to go I cant sing. Anyway, kt is going what, he is supposed to be the 歌神. So with him around it should be ok already le mah.
Sigh...
We gave up after a while, because we both knew the conversation was leading to nowhere.
And so the story ended with me and pris feeling bad, en'en feeling sian, the guys probably feeling relieved, and jes feeling ultra pissed.
I bet she is very bu shuang that the session is called off because of me... To the rest of the group I only feel bad, but towards her, I evily felt a sense of satisfaction.
Guess it would be a long time before she can be the star appearance for the group.
Sheesh, I am really mean to ppl that I dont like.
:P
Okay, make it most of the time.
I arranged with pris around last wed, that we would be going to sing k today. I cant recall why I decided to arrange a session with her, but I did, and I told her I will be asking along the rest of the group, meaning en'en, slt, ec, jes, jnce and kt.
She's ok, and I just spreaded the message around.
Because jnce and kt doesnt work in the company anymore, so we didnt get to ask them immediately. I asked jnce last fri, and she okay-ed on the spot. I left the job of informing kt to one of the guys.
Monday en'en told me that she have not ask kt, so I told her I will call him. But because she was going to call him for something else anyway, so I lazily pushed the job to her. (Heheh).
Eventually he told her he's on kiv.
On tues, I called jnce to cfm the date. She 爽快-ly said of course. But when I called kt, I practically had to beg cos he is still kiv-ing. I even stoop to new lows when I told him it is never my habit to call ppl to force attendance, I am giving him special 面子.
He still didnt give me an answer, saying will confirm with me the next day.
Come next day, he sms me to tell me he is not going.
By then, the confirmed attendance was only me, pris, en'en, jes and jnce would be the social butterfly for the night cos she has another party going on in another room in the same venue.
Slt first said he cannot be confirmed, we kept forcing him to come. He gave us his word.
Come today. I had a big quarrel with vnc, and I am in a pretty bad mood. En'en told me that slt may not be going already as he is the only confirm male for the night. I immediately contemplated to call off the session by then.
But I remembered that my main purpose was to go karaoke with pris, so I cannot sua dniu like tt. I told en'en nevermind, we would still go ahead.
I'm nursing a scratchy throat since yesterday and I'd already declared that I am probably not going to sing, but rather, sit in a corner with pris and talk to her between her songs.
Then en'en said that slt managed to get kt to go. I was utterly shocked, to say the least. I had kept asking via calls and sms and he insist he cannot make it, then the moment slt asked he said he can make it after all.
I bet he must be having some issues against me, if not why is he doing this?
Ok la, I am always too paranoid and too sensitive. I know, I know.
When pris told me her nose is very blocked, and wanted to postpone the session, I told her to go ahead.
And because my purpose for the session is her, if she is not going, I thought I am not going too.
Also, I dowan to see kt in case I flare up at him.
Also, my throat is not in the state to sing any songs.
Also, I am still in a lousy mood because of the quarrel with vnc.
Actually I was just being a bitch la. I wanted to test jes to see if she would not go if I dont go. But plan backfired.
I told jes that pris and myself are not going for karaoke already, and told her to go ahead with the rest of them. She immediately say ok, she will, "if she never ot".
See, anyhow test also can test out something. Crap one. What if she never ot. If all of us go sing k you think she would still back to do ot?
Weak fib.
I told en'en next that I am not going, and that the rest of them go ahead. She told me 'anything' then went ahead to cancel the session!!
Frankly, bitch here is waiting for them to come and sweet talk me into going cos I had been sweet talking them for the past few days. 没想到 en'en cancelled the session.
Not her fault of course, I too gey kiang already.
I really zek ark one leh. On my whim, I caused the session to be cancelled. But I really didnt expect that to happen. Because, as I told slt, before I join this group they are having fun without me what, so I expect even if I dont go, it would just be a pre-kanigi session lor.
What's wrong with that?
Slt said no lor, cos like I always announce, whenever I go, it is case of star appearance. So if I dont go it would be as fun.
Boy, I enjoy them treating me as their long-term clown.
I told him I am not feeling well enough to sing anyway, so even if I were to go I cant sing. Anyway, kt is going what, he is supposed to be the 歌神. So with him around it should be ok already le mah.
Sigh...
We gave up after a while, because we both knew the conversation was leading to nowhere.
And so the story ended with me and pris feeling bad, en'en feeling sian, the guys probably feeling relieved, and jes feeling ultra pissed.
I bet she is very bu shuang that the session is called off because of me... To the rest of the group I only feel bad, but towards her, I evily felt a sense of satisfaction.
Guess it would be a long time before she can be the star appearance for the group.
Sheesh, I am really mean to ppl that I dont like.
:P
Saturday, March 11, 2006
Pissed with jes #3
I think this is the 3rd post I am dedicating to how irritated I am with jes.
I was also pissed with her yesterday when she told me she answered my call while I was out.
At work, usually when calls come in, the receptionist will either direct the call or will intercom over the phone's speaker. That call for me was over the speaker, so jes answered it for me.
The details of the calls are not important, it was the thing that she said after that pissed me.
We were mentioning how come adl asked the client to call me while I was out, when she knows I went to deliver the document. Jes immediately say, "Yah lor, precisely that's why I answer the call for you, you know lah, you usually dont even get 2 calls a day, and I thought it should be vnc or one of the colleagues."
ARGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!
I really want to give her a karate kick sometimes, if I can fly kick. Stop saying I am very free. It is not my wish to be so free, and it is not within my control that I do my work very fast, clearing them at such a fast speed!
En'en kept trying to calm me down, asking me not to be so sensitive to what jes is saying, explaining jes probably dont mean it that way. I dunno if she is or if she isnt, but she certainly have the ability to 句句刺中要害.
I am very free at work these two days, and I kept asking adl if there is anything to be done. She said there is, but she is not free to brief me yet, and that she will get to be soonest.
Or whatever she gave me, I completed them within very short time then sometimes I am so bored with nothing to do that I actually do extra.
Mlh wanted me to grab this stock list and check which stock is sufficient to meet the client's needs. After that I am to grab the samples of them. I did all that was necessary and I was still bored, so I found all the samples, then for each sample, I indicated how many is available in the stock list.
Which is totally redundant, because she dont need to know the exact quantity, she just need to know which few items will fulfil the quantity she needs.
But I am too bored you see.
I cannot stand to be so free, jes knows it, and she would still ask me everyday for these few days, when I looked TOO obviously like I am swatting flies, that whether I am zou-bo-ing.
A%*$#%)%@&*&$_
Vulgarities worthy!
How. Initially when I am pissed I will just walk away. Now when I am fedup with her I am really showing her a black face already. I dont wish to be hypocritical, not liking her yet keep having lunch with her, yet I dunno how else I can handle her. Hen fan!
I was also pissed with her yesterday when she told me she answered my call while I was out.
At work, usually when calls come in, the receptionist will either direct the call or will intercom over the phone's speaker. That call for me was over the speaker, so jes answered it for me.
The details of the calls are not important, it was the thing that she said after that pissed me.
We were mentioning how come adl asked the client to call me while I was out, when she knows I went to deliver the document. Jes immediately say, "Yah lor, precisely that's why I answer the call for you, you know lah, you usually dont even get 2 calls a day, and I thought it should be vnc or one of the colleagues."
ARGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!
I really want to give her a karate kick sometimes, if I can fly kick. Stop saying I am very free. It is not my wish to be so free, and it is not within my control that I do my work very fast, clearing them at such a fast speed!
En'en kept trying to calm me down, asking me not to be so sensitive to what jes is saying, explaining jes probably dont mean it that way. I dunno if she is or if she isnt, but she certainly have the ability to 句句刺中要害.
I am very free at work these two days, and I kept asking adl if there is anything to be done. She said there is, but she is not free to brief me yet, and that she will get to be soonest.
Or whatever she gave me, I completed them within very short time then sometimes I am so bored with nothing to do that I actually do extra.
Mlh wanted me to grab this stock list and check which stock is sufficient to meet the client's needs. After that I am to grab the samples of them. I did all that was necessary and I was still bored, so I found all the samples, then for each sample, I indicated how many is available in the stock list.
Which is totally redundant, because she dont need to know the exact quantity, she just need to know which few items will fulfil the quantity she needs.
But I am too bored you see.
I cannot stand to be so free, jes knows it, and she would still ask me everyday for these few days, when I looked TOO obviously like I am swatting flies, that whether I am zou-bo-ing.
A%*$#%)%@&*&$_
Vulgarities worthy!
How. Initially when I am pissed I will just walk away. Now when I am fedup with her I am really showing her a black face already. I dont wish to be hypocritical, not liking her yet keep having lunch with her, yet I dunno how else I can handle her. Hen fan!
Muahahaha.
I cant let this past. *An shuang.*
I had to send some documents to SGH yesterday and hence I went to wait for a cab. When I reached the unofficial cab waiting area, a lady and an indian guy was there and were both impatient as there wasnt cabs (there wasnt while I strolled towards that area, at least) around.
After a few seconds of wait, a cab pulled up and the lady rushed onto the cab, leaving the indian guy looking very pissed.
I've no idea who was the earlier between the two of them, but the indian guy positively looked like he is going to smash someone's face in.
The next cab came after a few minutes time, I flagged it then stepped backwards so that the guy can board the cab. He still gave me a dirty look as though I was going to snatch his cab.
He opened the door and converse with the taxi driver, stepped away and closed the door. The taxi driver wound down the window of the same door and asked me where I was going. I informed, and he gestured that I hop on.
I gratefully did, for I was running late.
(I was late because adl said she would call me to tell me whether she needs me to send the documents. She said it is definately needed by 3pm and if she cannot make it she would call me and get me to send it down instead.
She obviously forgot, and I had to call her to confirm with her whether she need me to send the documents over, and she absent-mindedly told me to go ahead. I did remember to tell her that it is already very late (around 2.40pm at that time), and I will rush down, but I cannot confirm that I will not be late.)
Before I duck my head and entered the cab, I turned back and apologised to the indian guy, then I was on my way. The taxi driver asked me why did I need to apologise since it wasnt my fault. Even if an apology is needed, he should be the one offering it, because he was the one who rejected the guy.
I told him it doesnt matter, since it is just lip service. As long as it appease the person a little, and it doesnt harm me, no difference what~.
The taxi driver then asked me which way I want to go by, I told him any route is fine, as long as I get to my destination.
He asked me whether I wasnt afraid that he drives me to his home and introduce me to his son.
My first reaction was of course -_-", then after a split second I was reminded (by the devil on my right shoulder, no less) that I am still trying to get myself married off, so I laughed and ask him why should he be?
He mentioned that I seem very nice.
Kanigi thinks to herself : That small act of saying thanks works wonders. *Evil snicker*.
Then while I was still deep in conversation with my devil, he added that he thinks I wouldnt like his son anyway, because his son is too old for me.
I asked him how he knows? He said from the way it looks, his son must be at least 5 yrs older than me.
I quickly thought that 28yrs old also not bad mah, so I asked him how old his son is. (By a certain age, it is really a case of 宁可杀错不可放过!)
He said he is 21.
-_-"
-_-"!
I weakly told him cannot la. I am older than his son la! The taxi driver laughed and said 不要骗, I told him I am 23 already.
(Stupid en'en said that the taxi driver must be cock-eyed because he looked at me from his rear view mirror. I elbowed her.
Nah, no la. Hahah.
The taxi driver actually turned around and look at me when I say I am 23 la. And he still dont believe.)
He said he thinks I am at the most 18 or 19, and say he suspect I am even younger.
Muahahahah. Nothing beats looking young. =)
OK! I know what you bunch of 贱人 will say, that the taxi driver is only saying that to make me happy. Even so, I am still happy to hear the white lie, what can you do. Neh neh neh~!
I went back to the office then I brought it up with jes. She laughed along, then say a colleague also just mentioned to her that she looked like she is 20yrs old.
Kns one, I never say she also never say, I say liao she must say something to match. Playing games ar? Childish.
I had to send some documents to SGH yesterday and hence I went to wait for a cab. When I reached the unofficial cab waiting area, a lady and an indian guy was there and were both impatient as there wasnt cabs (there wasnt while I strolled towards that area, at least) around.
After a few seconds of wait, a cab pulled up and the lady rushed onto the cab, leaving the indian guy looking very pissed.
I've no idea who was the earlier between the two of them, but the indian guy positively looked like he is going to smash someone's face in.
The next cab came after a few minutes time, I flagged it then stepped backwards so that the guy can board the cab. He still gave me a dirty look as though I was going to snatch his cab.
He opened the door and converse with the taxi driver, stepped away and closed the door. The taxi driver wound down the window of the same door and asked me where I was going. I informed, and he gestured that I hop on.
I gratefully did, for I was running late.
(I was late because adl said she would call me to tell me whether she needs me to send the documents. She said it is definately needed by 3pm and if she cannot make it she would call me and get me to send it down instead.
She obviously forgot, and I had to call her to confirm with her whether she need me to send the documents over, and she absent-mindedly told me to go ahead. I did remember to tell her that it is already very late (around 2.40pm at that time), and I will rush down, but I cannot confirm that I will not be late.)
Before I duck my head and entered the cab, I turned back and apologised to the indian guy, then I was on my way. The taxi driver asked me why did I need to apologise since it wasnt my fault. Even if an apology is needed, he should be the one offering it, because he was the one who rejected the guy.
I told him it doesnt matter, since it is just lip service. As long as it appease the person a little, and it doesnt harm me, no difference what~.
The taxi driver then asked me which way I want to go by, I told him any route is fine, as long as I get to my destination.
He asked me whether I wasnt afraid that he drives me to his home and introduce me to his son.
My first reaction was of course -_-", then after a split second I was reminded (by the devil on my right shoulder, no less) that I am still trying to get myself married off, so I laughed and ask him why should he be?
He mentioned that I seem very nice.
Kanigi thinks to herself : That small act of saying thanks works wonders. *Evil snicker*.
Then while I was still deep in conversation with my devil, he added that he thinks I wouldnt like his son anyway, because his son is too old for me.
I asked him how he knows? He said from the way it looks, his son must be at least 5 yrs older than me.
I quickly thought that 28yrs old also not bad mah, so I asked him how old his son is. (By a certain age, it is really a case of 宁可杀错不可放过!)
He said he is 21.
-_-"
-_-"!
I weakly told him cannot la. I am older than his son la! The taxi driver laughed and said 不要骗, I told him I am 23 already.
(Stupid en'en said that the taxi driver must be cock-eyed because he looked at me from his rear view mirror. I elbowed her.
Nah, no la. Hahah.
The taxi driver actually turned around and look at me when I say I am 23 la. And he still dont believe.)
He said he thinks I am at the most 18 or 19, and say he suspect I am even younger.
Muahahahah. Nothing beats looking young. =)
OK! I know what you bunch of 贱人 will say, that the taxi driver is only saying that to make me happy. Even so, I am still happy to hear the white lie, what can you do. Neh neh neh~!
I went back to the office then I brought it up with jes. She laughed along, then say a colleague also just mentioned to her that she looked like she is 20yrs old.
Kns one, I never say she also never say, I say liao she must say something to match. Playing games ar? Childish.
RTL1.01 & RTL1.02
I finished my RTL1.01 and RTL1.02 this afternoon.
The trainer was saying 49% of all accidents involved riders, and showed us gruesome pictures of fatal accidents.
Luckily my life isnt worth too much, die le also like that. So I am not too affected.
I've booked for my riding theory evaluation for next sat, so meanwhile I will have to study for it. And discreetly too!
The trainer was saying 49% of all accidents involved riders, and showed us gruesome pictures of fatal accidents.
Luckily my life isnt worth too much, die le also like that. So I am not too affected.
I've booked for my riding theory evaluation for next sat, so meanwhile I will have to study for it. And discreetly too!
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Huh.
Actually I must outline the characters before I start this entry. But I am trying to be ambiguous at the same time. So to you who are reading, if you catch no ball... nevermind, it is not exactly of great importance.
Recently I am hanging out with this whole bunch of ppl. Among them there's this guy, whom I shall randomly name as Mr X, is a friend of one of them.
To cut the long story short, this whole group of ppl are trying to pair him and myself up.
We met thrice in group outings, and ever since after the first outing, they had been beginning to tease me non-stop. I am not sure if they are teasing him, but that is not too much of my concern. I am looking at the issue from my perspective only.
Like yesterday, slt asked me on msn. (Conversation based on my detoriating memory)
slt: so
me: what?
slt: what you think of mr x?
me: ok lor.
slt: he's a nice guy hor?
me: yah he is nice.
slt: and he is single too!
me: slt, you know, you are also single
me: why dont you and him get together then?
It's really... huh?
Mr X is a nice guy. Full stop.
I dont mind admitting if he likes me I am willing to give it a go. I've mentioned previously I believe, I've past the age to still believe in fairytale-like romance, or ouxiangju-like romance, or korean-sappy-love-stories. I dont even want to insist on finding the perfect match. To me, it doesnt really matter anymore.
I dont believe in love at first sight. I dont believe in loving head over heals, and fuck, I dont even believe 2 person can stay married. I am disillusionised. Everything is only good while it lasts, and no one can tell how long it lasts.
Hence, I am open to possibilities. There's more cruel things that I should say, but I shall leave it for mashi's ears.
I wonder they are teasing me because they think I like him? I dont even think I like him, so what is giving them that impression?
Sometimes, on the other hand, I think none of us are really contemplating the possibility of me and him really being together. It honestly feels too much like an instance of "There's no conversation topic in our outing, let's randomly point at two persons and let this 'budding romance' be the conversation topic from now on."
It feels like it. I feel they are just too bored with the lapse of silence.
So I should just do them the honour. Let them tease if they want to. So long as they are having fun. =)
Shoutout to en'en: You cant see this I know, but I hope you are not too bothered about what I am feeling abt jes. Whatever the feelings is, I know better than to splurt it out. I am getting out of her way, ignoring her she say things that are not nice upon my ears. I hope things will turn for a better from now.
Recently I am hanging out with this whole bunch of ppl. Among them there's this guy, whom I shall randomly name as Mr X, is a friend of one of them.
To cut the long story short, this whole group of ppl are trying to pair him and myself up.
We met thrice in group outings, and ever since after the first outing, they had been beginning to tease me non-stop. I am not sure if they are teasing him, but that is not too much of my concern. I am looking at the issue from my perspective only.
Like yesterday, slt asked me on msn. (Conversation based on my detoriating memory)
slt: so
me: what?
slt: what you think of mr x?
me: ok lor.
slt: he's a nice guy hor?
me: yah he is nice.
slt: and he is single too!
me: slt, you know, you are also single
me: why dont you and him get together then?
It's really... huh?
Mr X is a nice guy. Full stop.
I dont mind admitting if he likes me I am willing to give it a go. I've mentioned previously I believe, I've past the age to still believe in fairytale-like romance, or ouxiangju-like romance, or korean-sappy-love-stories. I dont even want to insist on finding the perfect match. To me, it doesnt really matter anymore.
I dont believe in love at first sight. I dont believe in loving head over heals, and fuck, I dont even believe 2 person can stay married. I am disillusionised. Everything is only good while it lasts, and no one can tell how long it lasts.
Hence, I am open to possibilities. There's more cruel things that I should say, but I shall leave it for mashi's ears.
I wonder they are teasing me because they think I like him? I dont even think I like him, so what is giving them that impression?
Sometimes, on the other hand, I think none of us are really contemplating the possibility of me and him really being together. It honestly feels too much like an instance of "There's no conversation topic in our outing, let's randomly point at two persons and let this 'budding romance' be the conversation topic from now on."
It feels like it. I feel they are just too bored with the lapse of silence.
So I should just do them the honour. Let them tease if they want to. So long as they are having fun. =)
Shoutout to en'en: You cant see this I know, but I hope you are not too bothered about what I am feeling abt jes. Whatever the feelings is, I know better than to splurt it out. I am getting out of her way, ignoring her she say things that are not nice upon my ears. I hope things will turn for a better from now.
How to file?
I've got no idea at all where to start... Faints.
I am stuck in the first option. Check if employer is participating in auto-inclusion. My last one is, current one isnt, so how?
I am stuck in the first option. Check if employer is participating in auto-inclusion. My last one is, current one isnt, so how?
Monday, March 06, 2006
The bitchy thing I did
My computer restarted on its own and I've lost the entry that I was typing. I am guessing I lost about 3 hundred words at the most. So it is not that bad. But still,
SIGH!!!
I guess I have really poor time management, because I am awake since 11am but I am getting to type this entry at this time of the day when I should already be in bed.
Ok, o/o/p.
I mentioned before that I want to blog about a bitchy thing that I did. Boy, I am glad I never gave jes this blog address, for she seems to be like someone who would be reading my blog at every chance that she have.
Of course, even if I never give anyone my blog address, it is not THAT hard to guess.
Arh... Fuck the consequences. If I cant even air my thoughts here, must I be talking to a rock then throwing it into the sea? I think I dowan to be talking to people at work how I feel about certain people and certain issues already, because I dowan my words to be intentionally/unintentionally twisted.
And there are some bitchy things that I do that I shouldnt even talk about, much less talk to colleagues about.
Anyway, here goes.
On thurs, jes was telling me how stressed she was and how much things she have to do. I had things to do as well, before you ask, although I had been leading a slacker's life these days.
I remember distinctively that I looked up from work and tried to offer some sympathy. Some weird company culture I have here.
Digress a little here, I just sighted a cockroach running towards me, luckily gor got rid of it for me. It actually crawled beneath a bookshelf and he was going to give up. I request he lure it out by spraying insecticide then killing it when it reappeared. He gave me a look of defeat but did it for me all the same.
It's time like this when I feel I've cute family members. Muahahahaha. Everyone in my family will help me kill cockroaches, my younger bro will even wake up in the middle of the night to slay them for me. =)
I was saying, some weird company culture I have. Everyone in the company is burning at both ends, but whenever someone come up to us to request for help or just to talk, we have to offer a few minutes of our time.
When I first started out at work here, I remembered ramming into a problem at my 2nd day at work. I no-choiced-ly went to ask michael for help, not wanting to disturb him at work actually but he immediately responsed to my queries.
Unable to solve my difficulty, he roped in mh to help, whom I do not know at all at that time. He too got up from whatever he was doing and helped me out.
That is my company culture, and I've grown to fit in. But sometimes I will still apologised and say I am in the midst of something, and promise the person I will get back at my next immediate available chance, which I always do. But whenever I can, I will still extend my assistance on the spot.
So when she commented that she was having too much to do, I looked up from what I was doing and asked her what is she doing at the moment, wanting to offer to help her do if it is within my capability.
She informed, but it is not my expertise, so I told her I cant help. She sighed then tried to get back to work but still seemed very bothered. I told her since she is having so much problem with it, maybe she want to explain to vnc of her workload and rope in vnc to help?
She immediately got defensive and pratically hissed at me, saying vnc had a lot to do too, how can she burden him?
I explained that I am not telling her to burden him, but since she cant cope, she must tell vnc that she needs assistance. Although it is not my style to call for help either, but at least if I had already accepted the work I would finish it no matter what. If I cant cope, I would have foresee that before I started and request the job to be distributed to someone else.
I rather admit that I cant achieve, rather that promise then make a mess of the work in terms of deadlines/quality/quantity.
Recently I am having some issues with jes. I dont know when did it started, but I am not liking her as much as before.
I always have this 歹款, that I cannot be too close to anyone for too long. I can be very emotionally attached to people, but bitchy-ly, this is exclusive to me only. Hahaha. I like to be emotionally attached to some people for a certain period of time, but cant stand it when people are to me.
She had been very tactless in the way she phrases her words these days, and I am not sure if I am being overly sensitive or what.
Like when I packed my workstation after completing one project, so that I can start a new project with a clear workspace, she have to comment, loud enough for a few to hear that "Wha, you very free hor, still got time to pack your workstation? I am so busy that I have no time to pack, look at how messy my things are."
I am very pissed when she said that. I am a self-proclaimed slacker, but that is called self-proclaimed for a reason. I am not slacking at work of course, but I cant help it if there is no work to be done right? I complete my work asap, then before more work comes my way, I can only sit there and streamline my work process.
To jes, I am slacking.
I am sorry that I have no work to do while you have a lot of things to do, so bite me can? What's with your thorns infested words?
I've got things to do as well, but I am clearing them at a faster pace probably because I am more organised than you do. You can say your jobscope is more tedious than mine, but no one ask you to choose that job what.
No matter how busy I am, when someone ask, I will say that "I've got things on hand", or in some situations where I am tactless, I will just say "Sorry, 我在忙, I'll get to you later can? (with a paiseh smile)"
But jes will actually say "I am so busy that I dont have time to drink water."
Please lah. Got this 夸张 meh? I got this response from her when I asked her if she wanted to go get a drink from the pantry and she said she is so busy that she cant step away. I then offered to GET A DRINK FOR HER instead and she told me the above.
Ok, the background explaining of why I am being to like her lesser will take forever to document. Because there are many small instances of things that she does that I cannot stand. Before I even start to blog about it in one of my coming entries, let me ANNOUNCE again that I am blogging it to free my anger, not because I am harbouring any wild wishes that she change. Who the fuck am I to her to expect that?
Let me get back to thurs.
So I told her if she cant cope, she should tell vnc, and vnc would be able to assist. She keep saying that vnc had a lot on his hands already.
I told her that is beside the point, because whether vnc has a lot of work on hands is not relative to whether she should tell him she cant cope.
If vnc cant cope, that is his problem. He can go talk to his boss if he wants to. But if jes cant cope she should quickly tell vnc so that the issue is solved earlier, and not too late into the problem when nothing can be done to salvage the situation.
She was so upset with my suggestion that I had to retreat from my seat so that I dont get into an arguement with her.
She went for her facial at 7 and vnc came back.
(Sigh, after so much of background story I am finally getting to the bitchy part.)
I went to tell vnc that jes is very stressed.
I made it sound like I am very concerned that she seems to be unable to cope with her work, but actually I am taking the chance to backstab her after her recent stints.
I know recently she is spurting a lot of my things to vnc and I wanted to act like the way she did, and hoped that vnc tell her that I am talking about her, so that she realised how much I've already gathered and known, and not to backstab me in front of vnc.
I told vnc jes seems very worried about the project she is working on, and chided vnc for not offering more help to her.
Vnc was immediately concerned, and asked me was jes really that stressed? I told him the truth from then on, telling him that she seems to be stressed with her work and that she cant seem to cope. Vnc said he had a lot of work himself, so does michael.
I told him to treat jes better, cos she is a lady after all, and not to be so harsh to her.
He exclaimed that he is never harsh on her! And he is already being very fair!
I told him since he is already not being harsh, he should be able to take one step further and be very nice to jes then, cant he?
That is just the kind of thing vnc hates to hear, (I am sorry but vnc is a very easy character to analyse imo. I will be doing a literature-style character analysis of everyone I know soon. Key word is SOON. Hahahaha.) because he likes to think that he is already doing a good enough job to be a good boss.
And also, jes is his first female subordinate, so he is always treading carefully around her.
Actually, as far as I can see, vnc is ALREADY being very accomodative towards jes, but of course being the bitch that I am, I have to unleash my devil, so I continue to make him believe he have to be treating jes with more care.
Vnc looks defeated, and so I used another tactic. I told him although jes may have a strong facade, she 毕竟 isnt like me. I stand up for myself and refused to be abused. Jes would meekly do all his sai-gang for him and have not a word of grumble.
I told him how I advised jes to tell him of how she is unable to cope with her workload and that she defended vnc, saying he is very busy too. Vnc nodded and say she is correct. I pushed the fact that since she 维护him so much, in return he should 罩 her more.
Vnc bought that idea, and when jes came back from facial, he immediately asked if she had eaten and brought her to eat dinner.
And if you are still wondering where am I benefitting in this whole hoo-ha, I am sorry to inform you I am not benefitting at all. My jobscope and jes's jobscope doesnt overlap so I wont be gaining anything from this.
I am doing it purely to emphasise on fact that she needs constant attention. Give her the constant attention and get her off my back.
Let her know how lucky she is to have a good boss, and in contrast look at how my boss is treating me.
SIGH!!!
I guess I have really poor time management, because I am awake since 11am but I am getting to type this entry at this time of the day when I should already be in bed.
Ok, o/o/p.
I mentioned before that I want to blog about a bitchy thing that I did. Boy, I am glad I never gave jes this blog address, for she seems to be like someone who would be reading my blog at every chance that she have.
Of course, even if I never give anyone my blog address, it is not THAT hard to guess.
Arh... Fuck the consequences. If I cant even air my thoughts here, must I be talking to a rock then throwing it into the sea? I think I dowan to be talking to people at work how I feel about certain people and certain issues already, because I dowan my words to be intentionally/unintentionally twisted.
And there are some bitchy things that I do that I shouldnt even talk about, much less talk to colleagues about.
Anyway, here goes.
On thurs, jes was telling me how stressed she was and how much things she have to do. I had things to do as well, before you ask, although I had been leading a slacker's life these days.
I remember distinctively that I looked up from work and tried to offer some sympathy. Some weird company culture I have here.
Digress a little here, I just sighted a cockroach running towards me, luckily gor got rid of it for me. It actually crawled beneath a bookshelf and he was going to give up. I request he lure it out by spraying insecticide then killing it when it reappeared. He gave me a look of defeat but did it for me all the same.
It's time like this when I feel I've cute family members. Muahahahaha. Everyone in my family will help me kill cockroaches, my younger bro will even wake up in the middle of the night to slay them for me. =)
I was saying, some weird company culture I have. Everyone in the company is burning at both ends, but whenever someone come up to us to request for help or just to talk, we have to offer a few minutes of our time.
When I first started out at work here, I remembered ramming into a problem at my 2nd day at work. I no-choiced-ly went to ask michael for help, not wanting to disturb him at work actually but he immediately responsed to my queries.
Unable to solve my difficulty, he roped in mh to help, whom I do not know at all at that time. He too got up from whatever he was doing and helped me out.
That is my company culture, and I've grown to fit in. But sometimes I will still apologised and say I am in the midst of something, and promise the person I will get back at my next immediate available chance, which I always do. But whenever I can, I will still extend my assistance on the spot.
So when she commented that she was having too much to do, I looked up from what I was doing and asked her what is she doing at the moment, wanting to offer to help her do if it is within my capability.
She informed, but it is not my expertise, so I told her I cant help. She sighed then tried to get back to work but still seemed very bothered. I told her since she is having so much problem with it, maybe she want to explain to vnc of her workload and rope in vnc to help?
She immediately got defensive and pratically hissed at me, saying vnc had a lot to do too, how can she burden him?
I explained that I am not telling her to burden him, but since she cant cope, she must tell vnc that she needs assistance. Although it is not my style to call for help either, but at least if I had already accepted the work I would finish it no matter what. If I cant cope, I would have foresee that before I started and request the job to be distributed to someone else.
I rather admit that I cant achieve, rather that promise then make a mess of the work in terms of deadlines/quality/quantity.
Recently I am having some issues with jes. I dont know when did it started, but I am not liking her as much as before.
I always have this 歹款, that I cannot be too close to anyone for too long. I can be very emotionally attached to people, but bitchy-ly, this is exclusive to me only. Hahaha. I like to be emotionally attached to some people for a certain period of time, but cant stand it when people are to me.
She had been very tactless in the way she phrases her words these days, and I am not sure if I am being overly sensitive or what.
Like when I packed my workstation after completing one project, so that I can start a new project with a clear workspace, she have to comment, loud enough for a few to hear that "Wha, you very free hor, still got time to pack your workstation? I am so busy that I have no time to pack, look at how messy my things are."
I am very pissed when she said that. I am a self-proclaimed slacker, but that is called self-proclaimed for a reason. I am not slacking at work of course, but I cant help it if there is no work to be done right? I complete my work asap, then before more work comes my way, I can only sit there and streamline my work process.
To jes, I am slacking.
I am sorry that I have no work to do while you have a lot of things to do, so bite me can? What's with your thorns infested words?
I've got things to do as well, but I am clearing them at a faster pace probably because I am more organised than you do. You can say your jobscope is more tedious than mine, but no one ask you to choose that job what.
No matter how busy I am, when someone ask, I will say that "I've got things on hand", or in some situations where I am tactless, I will just say "Sorry, 我在忙, I'll get to you later can? (with a paiseh smile)"
But jes will actually say "I am so busy that I dont have time to drink water."
Please lah. Got this 夸张 meh? I got this response from her when I asked her if she wanted to go get a drink from the pantry and she said she is so busy that she cant step away. I then offered to GET A DRINK FOR HER instead and she told me the above.
Ok, the background explaining of why I am being to like her lesser will take forever to document. Because there are many small instances of things that she does that I cannot stand. Before I even start to blog about it in one of my coming entries, let me ANNOUNCE again that I am blogging it to free my anger, not because I am harbouring any wild wishes that she change. Who the fuck am I to her to expect that?
Let me get back to thurs.
So I told her if she cant cope, she should tell vnc, and vnc would be able to assist. She keep saying that vnc had a lot on his hands already.
I told her that is beside the point, because whether vnc has a lot of work on hands is not relative to whether she should tell him she cant cope.
If vnc cant cope, that is his problem. He can go talk to his boss if he wants to. But if jes cant cope she should quickly tell vnc so that the issue is solved earlier, and not too late into the problem when nothing can be done to salvage the situation.
She was so upset with my suggestion that I had to retreat from my seat so that I dont get into an arguement with her.
She went for her facial at 7 and vnc came back.
(Sigh, after so much of background story I am finally getting to the bitchy part.)
I went to tell vnc that jes is very stressed.
I made it sound like I am very concerned that she seems to be unable to cope with her work, but actually I am taking the chance to backstab her after her recent stints.
I know recently she is spurting a lot of my things to vnc and I wanted to act like the way she did, and hoped that vnc tell her that I am talking about her, so that she realised how much I've already gathered and known, and not to backstab me in front of vnc.
I told vnc jes seems very worried about the project she is working on, and chided vnc for not offering more help to her.
Vnc was immediately concerned, and asked me was jes really that stressed? I told him the truth from then on, telling him that she seems to be stressed with her work and that she cant seem to cope. Vnc said he had a lot of work himself, so does michael.
I told him to treat jes better, cos she is a lady after all, and not to be so harsh to her.
He exclaimed that he is never harsh on her! And he is already being very fair!
I told him since he is already not being harsh, he should be able to take one step further and be very nice to jes then, cant he?
That is just the kind of thing vnc hates to hear, (I am sorry but vnc is a very easy character to analyse imo. I will be doing a literature-style character analysis of everyone I know soon. Key word is SOON. Hahahaha.) because he likes to think that he is already doing a good enough job to be a good boss.
And also, jes is his first female subordinate, so he is always treading carefully around her.
Actually, as far as I can see, vnc is ALREADY being very accomodative towards jes, but of course being the bitch that I am, I have to unleash my devil, so I continue to make him believe he have to be treating jes with more care.
Vnc looks defeated, and so I used another tactic. I told him although jes may have a strong facade, she 毕竟 isnt like me. I stand up for myself and refused to be abused. Jes would meekly do all his sai-gang for him and have not a word of grumble.
I told him how I advised jes to tell him of how she is unable to cope with her workload and that she defended vnc, saying he is very busy too. Vnc nodded and say she is correct. I pushed the fact that since she 维护him so much, in return he should 罩 her more.
Vnc bought that idea, and when jes came back from facial, he immediately asked if she had eaten and brought her to eat dinner.
And if you are still wondering where am I benefitting in this whole hoo-ha, I am sorry to inform you I am not benefitting at all. My jobscope and jes's jobscope doesnt overlap so I wont be gaining anything from this.
I am doing it purely to emphasise on fact that she needs constant attention. Give her the constant attention and get her off my back.
Let her know how lucky she is to have a good boss, and in contrast look at how my boss is treating me.
I am weird, and I know it
There are some people, like I ever mentioned before, that I want their attention but I cant get it, and there are some people whom is seeking mine but I am furiously rejecting.
It may sound very strange to certain people, I dont know how can I explain it properly and coherently, but that is just me.
Unfortunately, I am too 任性 to worry about what other feels. I come and go as I like. If you dont like me I but suay suay for you that I like you, I will keep coming closer and closer until you eventually accept me. Once I do, we may share many close moments together, but when I feel I have to halt this relationship, it is at my discreet.
I know how 讨人厌 this habit of mine is, I know! But I am not having any strong intention to change myself.
Ironically, jes once mentioned to me that since I am a typical cancerian, I must be such that I dont like people to be too good to me.
Which is very true. I dont like ppl to be too nice to me. Moderation, everyone. Be sweet to me and I will love you. A slight overdose and I will avoid you. I dunno where the line is, I'm sorry, but I can tell you slightly less is better than slightly more.
This habit of leaving friends seemed to be due to the fact that I dont like ppl to know me too well. I never like telling a single person every detail in my life. I would rather tell different ppl different things, so that no one knows the entire picture.
I dunno what is it that scares me, someone who knows me too well, or the prospect of someone whom knows me too well hurting me.
But I rather not find out by the hard way. I rather be the one being selective of who to say what to.
There is another group of ppl that I am being cruel with.
I said "I'm less chivalrous to people whom I once find indispensable. Once upon a time, there are a few people whom I immediately associate as friends/hao peng you.
I love to be around them, and it seemed, back then, that they must be present to make my life a fulfilling and joyful one. Now I see them without their glow, and am scathing with my words which I am describing them in the deep of my heart."
I am very nice to them, and they are nice back. But I withdraw my attention at my pleasure, and sometimes these people are shocked by my sudden coldness.
Maybe cant call it coldness, but the positive feelings are definately gone.
I am such a person that I will express what I feel. If I miss a friend I will say I miss him/her. If I treasure a friend a lot, he/she will know. I dowan to regret not telling any of my friends how much they mean to me, and how much I love them for being here for me all these while.
So to my bestest friends, they are used to me being so verbal, and leaves me alone when I am not. They will not suspect I no longer care for them when I stopped saying I care. I am such that I may love you a lot now, but I might suddenly grow sick of you for a while and I dowan to talk to you for that one or two weeks. I just need to have the space to be away from you.
Pardon me and I will be back soon, usually still loving you.
I said "I'm less chivalrous to people whom I once find indispensable. Once upon a time, there are a few people whom I immediately associate as friends/hao peng you.
I love to be around them, and it seemed, back then, that they must be present to make my life a fulfilling and joyful one. Now I see them without their glow, and am scathing with my words which I am describing them in the deep of my heart."
I am very nice to them, and they are nice back. But I withdraw my attention at my pleasure, and sometimes these people are shocked by my sudden coldness.
Maybe cant call it coldness, but the positive feelings are definately gone.
I am such a person that I will express what I feel. If I miss a friend I will say I miss him/her. If I treasure a friend a lot, he/she will know. I dowan to regret not telling any of my friends how much they mean to me, and how much I love them for being here for me all these while.
So to my bestest friends, they are used to me being so verbal, and leaves me alone when I am not. They will not suspect I no longer care for them when I stopped saying I care. I am such that I may love you a lot now, but I might suddenly grow sick of you for a while and I dowan to talk to you for that one or two weeks. I just need to have the space to be away from you.
Pardon me and I will be back soon, usually still loving you.
It may sound very strange to certain people, I dont know how can I explain it properly and coherently, but that is just me.
Unfortunately, I am too 任性 to worry about what other feels. I come and go as I like. If you dont like me I but suay suay for you that I like you, I will keep coming closer and closer until you eventually accept me. Once I do, we may share many close moments together, but when I feel I have to halt this relationship, it is at my discreet.
I know how 讨人厌 this habit of mine is, I know! But I am not having any strong intention to change myself.
Ironically, jes once mentioned to me that since I am a typical cancerian, I must be such that I dont like people to be too good to me.
Which is very true. I dont like ppl to be too nice to me. Moderation, everyone. Be sweet to me and I will love you. A slight overdose and I will avoid you. I dunno where the line is, I'm sorry, but I can tell you slightly less is better than slightly more.
This habit of leaving friends seemed to be due to the fact that I dont like ppl to know me too well. I never like telling a single person every detail in my life. I would rather tell different ppl different things, so that no one knows the entire picture.
I dunno what is it that scares me, someone who knows me too well, or the prospect of someone whom knows me too well hurting me.
But I rather not find out by the hard way. I rather be the one being selective of who to say what to.
Sunday, March 05, 2006
Friday, March 03, 2006
I thought I am crazy
But not as much as jes is, I realised.
I worked ot till 12am today. That is stupid I know.
But jes actually ot for one hr until 7, then went for facial and came back at 9.45pm because vnc was still in the office!
They went for dinner while I forsaken mine, and came back at 10.45pm. By the time I left at 12am, jes didnt have the intention to leave at all.
I suspect she really admires vnc, lest the fact he is married to a colleague and with a son. I dont mean admire in the romance sense anyway.
I think she feels vnc is really good at his work, and knowing information at the back of his hand. That is something that I am in awe of, but I also think he is that good probably because he had been in this job for 10 yrs.
I bet, IF I ever did, I will be highly effecient in work and memorising of information what.
Aiyah, that's beside the point already.
Anyway, I meant to blog about something bitchy thing I did. But I am too sleepy. Let's see tmr how. =)
I worked ot till 12am today. That is stupid I know.
But jes actually ot for one hr until 7, then went for facial and came back at 9.45pm because vnc was still in the office!
They went for dinner while I forsaken mine, and came back at 10.45pm. By the time I left at 12am, jes didnt have the intention to leave at all.
I suspect she really admires vnc, lest the fact he is married to a colleague and with a son. I dont mean admire in the romance sense anyway.
I think she feels vnc is really good at his work, and knowing information at the back of his hand. That is something that I am in awe of, but I also think he is that good probably because he had been in this job for 10 yrs.
I bet, IF I ever did, I will be highly effecient in work and memorising of information what.
Aiyah, that's beside the point already.
Anyway, I meant to blog about something bitchy thing I did. But I am too sleepy. Let's see tmr how. =)
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