Sibei Eng: Imagination Cubed

Imagination Cubed



From Great Eastern.

I particularly like the way the replay button work, when it never show your mistakes and you undo-ing them. Muahahaha.

6 pairs

Here, as usual.



Among which, I fancied the one with orange butterflies most. But orange is such a colour, that though I favour, doesnt compliment me because my skin tone is too yellowish in my opinion.

The simple square shaped one is pretty useful too. It is too unglam to go with any clothings, and I adore it for that. And it makes the nicest tring-tring-tring sound as I move my head.

Wha, look at the range of earrings I bought. Amost every colour is available!

Actually there is a white pair too, but I might have to do some tweaking myself because it looks nice on display but I could only recoil in horrid when I saw how it looks on my ears.

As soon as I remember to get a pair of pliers the next time I go out, I will do some clever repairing to it and it would be added to my listed collection of jewellery.

The fourth pair in the above group is from my cousin. Mashi also gave me earrings recently, but her taste is really, ahem, of most extraordinaire.

I'll dismantle them at my next chance too.

Wishes in life

Of course I hope to eventually marry myself off to a man who loves me lots. It would be a better situation for him to love me more than me him. But so far, I've only managed to consider guys whom I like in the first place.

Well, I do wish I eventually met that person. And I wish that person good luck first. My temper sucks, I can put up sufficient pretense in front of everyone else but someone who needs to be with me for the rest of his life would definately have a tough road to walk down.

Muahahaha.

Other than this wish, I've got another two wishes in life. As in two major ones. I have smaller dreams but they will take forever to list, so forget it.

Number one is that I want to get back to my studies. My greatest obstacle here is money, and I hope after next year, after I repaid my whole poly school loan from my mother's cpf I can successfully loan money from bank to study another diploma so that I can eventually do I want in life, that is, to be a teacher.

Number two is a relatively smaller wish compared to Number one. It would cost me less than 1k if I fulfil this wish at the surface level and not proceed to the next step.

I know I am being ambiguous here. But I think I am not going to go into details yet.

All I can say is that it is also something about learning, and it takes registration. Once I registered and paid I cant back out anymore.

I am looking to book on wed, while I am still off from work. Once I did, I would come back here to report. =)

It is at least one year away for my first dream, and although I've been very insistent that I want to fulfil that dream, sometimes I cant help but to worry that I cant fulfil it due to the monetary factor.

This Number two dream is relatively cheaper, so I think I should at least try to get one dream fulfilled first. I dowan to die with regrets, and I dunno when I would die.

Scurry I die trying to fulfil dream Number two.

Then also good, then I would not need to worry about Number one anymore. When I reincarnate, I hope to be born into a extremely rich family, so rich that I can spend my whole life studying.

Sibei Eng: Make a Flake

Make-a-Flake

Can waste your 5 mins here. I just did.

Plenty of annoyance!

As I mentioned before, the stupid bluetooth is spoilt.

I recieved a sms confirmation on sun that I can go down to west mall to get an one-for-one exchange, but because I was doing ot for the past few days, I could only go down today.

Only to realise it is out of stock.

The staff there are friendly, but cannot solve problems for customer one. I waited at least 20 mins for an unsatisfactory answer.

They told me the dongle is out of stock.

I specifically called m1 hotline to inform them to put it in the system that I want an exchange and they happily not save one for me.

The staff there asked me back if anyone knew I was coming down today? I told her truthfully, not, because I meant to come down earlier but I was stuck at work so I cant make it to west mall at all!

And it was m1 who say I must go back to west mall to get the exchange because that was where I bought it.

Now they are blaming me for not coming down immediately after they told me I can come down for the exchange!

The staff then tell me she has no idea when the dongle will be avail at west mall, and she would call me once it is avail. Then she beamed and told me maybe I can get one from another branch!

I had to restrain every muscle to avoid grabbing her hair and box her face in. Partly because it is not her fault. Partly because I still want to upkeep my image. If can get it from another branch then say earlier what! I asked so many times m1 hotline keep telling me cannot! If can I could get it from change alley what, I pass by there everyday!

Now that I can get it from there, I have to wait until next fri cos it is the cny!

KNN.

And, and, and. They originally made it sound like I am dead meat because I've lost the original reciept, and I must go down to west mall to get the warranty card stamped (they stupidly forgot to stamp for me back then) so that I still have some liability.

I had to make a special trip down, shunning work and leaving jes to ot with vnc until 11.30pm, to get the stupid stamp.

Just now they printed the reciept for me.

KNN!!!

They are really a bunch of jokers leh. Like that very fun ar, spin me around and around. Grrgh.

I cannot comprehend my emotions

I have no idea why am I so concerned with the fact that vnc treats jes better. Or micheal treats jes better, or whoever whoever whoever treats jes better. I can go on forever in this list.

I like jes a lot, I am not secretly stabbing her effigy in the privacy of my bedroom, I am only sick of why people always like my friends better.

Whatever you say in your defence about you treating both of us equally good will not appease me in the least, dont waste your time.

Of course you will say I think too much, of course you will feel I am silly, but I am guessing no one else understands the frustration of being less-liked.

I am still fortunate in that sense that I am still quite well-recieved by friends, colleagues, whoever, but my grievance here is that why is it that people always like my friends better lah!

My intelligence tells me that it is because of my flawed character brings out the goodness in my friends!

Tamade!

I dowan!!

I dowan to improve others at my expense!

Guess my friends should be feeling really pleased. It isnt everyday that they can find someone who can compliments them in whatever they can do.

What's wrong with me?

As usual, I had been working OT today.

I didnt want to, especially after I worked 5 hours of OT on sat, but I couldnt finish what I have to do. Sometimes I think I am really not productive. Given a more stringent deadline, like 3 hours, I bet I can churn out the drawing as well.

But because I was given one full day of undivided attention, instead I couldnt finish it even within 8 working hours.

Jes wasnt in the office today and hence I had a lot of time to mingle with other colleagues. I had lunch with ncn, slt and ec, had quite an in-depth conversation with ylp and pris in separate moment.

Especially pris. I never had much time to talk to her before, but within that 30mins today, we agreed that the jobscope and workload at this job is very okay, but the supps are the one monsters.

UFOs, we called them now. These unidentified flying objects hover above our heads and waiting for chance to peck at us.

Pris's ufo is ylp, while my ufo is adl, jes's ufo is vnc. I am still dissed with vnc for what he did on fri. So much so that when iris came by to look for him just now I just muttered that 'He's dead, so I heard.'

Sometimes I am so childish I want to smack myself.

Then again, he isnt very matured to begin with. 'Nuff said.

Last fri, I was very tied up with one project when he told me he need me to help him with another. I told him that current one that I was doing is needed by the same day and whatever he wants can only come after.

He told me he need it the same day as well.

I look at my workload and I thought I should be able to finish it by 4pm. I asked him if his project can wait till 6? And he asked me if I could give it to him any earlier.

I laughed and told him 5:45 then and he still wanted earlier. I told him last bargain, 5:40 and that's it. I had other project commitments and I dowan to tell him a time which I cannot commit.

At 4.00, I realised I cant finish my own project and I started getting worried. I tried to pia thru my work but because I had autocad dwg to do, pics to scan and annotate, and I still need to explain the project to jes. I was falling behind schedule and I was beginning to worry about not being able to finish vnc's project.

At 4:30, he called me and asked if I looked for him. I told him I didnt and admitted that I havent got to his dwg yet. He told me the client had called him 20 times already and he didnt answered her calls. I told him never mind, I will call the client and settle it for him then. And I ended his call.

I called the client and tried to explain to her that because vnc is on leave, I was in charge of coming up with the drawing for her so that she can get it the same day. She immediately said that she spoke to vnc that morning, what do I mean that he is on leave?

(Knn. Never bak gak properly with me. Dio lia.)

I sheepishly confessed that vnc is actually on half day leave and he already passed the project to me, only that I was too tied up with my other projects to get to hers.

(Stupid me, still trying to help him cover up.)

I asked her if she could give me another 2 hours, and she practically shouted what do I mean by asking for another 2 hours when she already gave us 2 days! I was at a total loss for words as I didnt realised the length of time where the project had been given to us. She said she needed the information (in quantities) immediately because the colleague who needs it is going overseas the same day and that colleague will only be back after cny.

Painfully, I told her I will give her the quantities in 30 mins and she was appeased.

(Honestly, I dunno how come I dare to promise something like that then, but I was really at the edge of the cliff, I had to give an answer no matter what.)

Eventually, I managed to give her what she want, even swallowing her sarcasm when she implied I must had bad news when I called her exactly at 5. I had the information then, but the moment she heard my voice she asked me "Bad news I believe?"

I ignored her and relayed the information. She asked me if I took into consideration some of the factors and I was stumped once again.

Apparently she told ckw, and ckw supposed to tell vnc who was supposed to tell me if he needs me to do the drawing. But hell, nothing was conveyed and I had no fucking idea of what happened.

Still, I managed to fend for myself and ended the call quickly enough, and ended the verbal ill-treatment. Fed-up, I called vnc and demanded to know how come he didnt give me sufficient instuctions.

He acted like he dunno anything.

I had to bite my tongue to avoid lashing out vulgarities like I usually would, and asked him if he wanted me to do anything, shouldnt him be giving me enough information, instead of leaving me rendered speechless in front of the client?

He had the guts to tell me "So?"

I demanded to know if it was a set up, and did he got me to call that client when he knows very well that I would be taken to be the dartboard immediately. He again, told me "So?"

To realise that he did it on purpose really drain air out of me. He is not even my boss now and he is stabbing me. Luckily it is a shallow wound. I dont understand how come adl is like that, vnc also have to be like that.

Create some mess with the client then acted like nothing happened and got an unsuspecting me to call to get scolded on their behalf.

Tamade.

I quietly asked vnc so he feels I fully deserved to be ranted at, despite the fact that the project was not mine to begine with? He said "Yes."

I thanked him and slammed the phone.

Today jes told me vnc asked her if I was scolded by the client on fri. Jes told him an affirmative answer and he told her he need to call the client to apologise for not answering her calls.

I told jes shouldnt vnc be apologising to me instead? Especially after I've appeased the client for him?!?!!? HUH!!!!!

By the time vnc call the client, she would have no more anger because she had already vented her anger towards vnc on me and I have since settled the project for her.

While I was working OT just now, jes had left and I was the only one in the team still working. Vnc called and I told him jes isnt around. He insisted that he wasnt looking for her, and he called and asked to be put through to anyone in his team. As I was the only one left, I had to pick up the call.

I cannot understand why is it that he was looking for jes but he die die also dont admit. Mchl is on mc, and there is only jes who is directly under him. If he called back trying to reach for someone in his team, it is obvious, I can even tell using my toenails, that he is looking for jes.

But he refused to admit, and I dowan to argue with him, I was tired.

He asked me why was I still in office at that time, and I told him that it had got nothing to do with him. I kept demanding to know what he wants. Did he need me to check his email for him? Did he need me to find a file for him? Did he what???

He mentioned that he called the client and had settled the problem. He said the client had no outstanding issues for she had already liased with me. He told her he was in a seminar and couldnt answer her calls and could only send me an sms.

Very smart, 推得一干二净.

He is really testing my limits. I have no idea how to defend myself against his sabotage at all. Against adl I could just put on my defiant front and insist on my way. With vnc why am I at such a lose-lose situation.

Could it be he is reading me like an open book like I him? I can predict almost every reaction he have, yet I cant come up with ways fast enough to fight him.

I am fighting a losing battle, it seems.

I dunno what to do

Ø Gmailblog Ø

I dunno how I should be reacting now, and I dunno if I should be talking to someone about it.

She is having conflicts with my supp and is harbouring intentions to leave.

If I dont try to get someone to talk her out of it she might just resign at short notice.

At the same time, her leaving might be of good to the team. She makes mistakes at work and the team is getting fed up with her. Upon her leaving, the team can look forward to less errors in the documents.

If I were to broadcast her intentions they will definately try to retain her and hence she might not leave, and continue to cause problems in the process of work.

But based on relationship, I think I should be getting someone to talk to her. Maybe at the same time this person can talk to her about her working attitude. If she changed for the better there is no reason for the team to be fed up with her and there is no reason for her to leave, unless she is THAT angry with my supp.

That brings to another question. I cant bring this up with my supp because she already said she dowan to speak to her. So am I supposed to speak to vnc about it instead? Or jes and ask jes to advice?

Maybe not, maybe not jes. I should be going to vnc directly I think. And ask him to talk to her. But I am asking him as what identity? A colleague? A colleague asking another colleague to ask another colleague not to leave?  

Now that is confusing.

And if I did talk to vnc and adl hears of it, I am dead. I dont side her, but I dowan to jeopardise any remaining shreds of working relationship we still hold.

Now what do I do?

Sibei Eng: Netscape

When I was still using IE, I had a bookmarks section named 'Sibei Eng' where I list down the interesting websites that I chanced upon while surf net.

Back then when I was very free, I surf net a lot, lapping up any articles that sparks some interest in me.

Recently I am less free cos I am always stuck in office doing ot. But when I am I want to go thru this webbie. Very colourful and intersting!

Fun & Games - Netscape Fun & Games

Let's see when I will eventually get to surfing the site in it's entirety. Muahaha.

Catching up on photos

These are some pictures that have been in my camera for sometime time already but I had no mood to edit them out. I just transferred them and cropped them, no mood to adjust lighting and etc.



These two pics are presents I recieved on christmas day. The very colourful one, shirt-shaped, is from ylp, the green box is from ncn, green thingee in plastic is from adl, perlini silver is from vnc. The bottle thingee is supposed to grow grass on it's head, but so far it is sprouting split ends only.

Jes's presents are not here because she gave them to me at the really last second.

I am aware I still havent update a picture of the ugly expensive bracelet. But till date I've already gathered support from mashi, sis and jes that the bracelet is ugly. Anni said it is 'unique' but I noted her disguested expression.


Other than these two pics, I want to include these in this entry.


The pics sucks.

But eason's singing doesnt, of course.

I am super bored

Ø Gmailblog Ø

I dont know what am I trying to prove. It doesnt mean that by working longer hours I will have a better chance to be converted into a confirmed staff. But yet again, it is not stopping me from trying.

It didnt matter to me previously, I think I do feel a tinge of regret to let go of that good paying job. But taking up the job is not going to do much good for my karma points.

Is karma or money more important to me? I did ask myself. I am banking on money actually, because that is the factor that is stopping me from furthering my studies.

Sometimes I cannot decide what I want for myself, or is the decisions I made truely correct. I think I can only pray more.

Tired.

I am very tired these days. Granted that I did a lot of OT, had been spending long hours at work, and had been loaded with so much work that I have not a moment to spare.

But I had plenty of sleep over the weekend. So why is it that I am so lethargic.

I realised I am sprouting grey hairs, and that I am waking up many times throughout the night. It had always been a norm for me to sleep a night filled with dreams, but recently I had been jolting awake thru the nights and have been taking a long time to fall back to sleep.

It had been subconsciously stressful at work I guess. I thought I dont feel too stressed but apparently I am quite burned-out. I am highly distracted and I cannot really concentrate. I dont wish to blame it all on stress, that seems to be such an easy excuse, but I guess the stress factor is affecting me.

The bluetooth issue sucks too.

But I am too tired to blog about it. Yet.

I am offered another job which would pay me better. Money is always a temptation, but can I bear to leave nice colleagues like jes and michael and vnc? Or would it be better if I leave, cos 距离就是美.




I DONT KNOW!




Seriously, I dont know.



I really dont know.


And yah, esther, I still havent forgot about wanting to blog about adl. But my grievance is so thick that it takes at least 3 hours to blog it. And it is a dilemna as usual. Part of me wants to forget about the things that she did and get on with life, another part of me urges to blog it down so that I can (hopefully) view things from a different angle.

Crap.

I dont know what I want, I dont know how to know what I want.

I dreamt

I had been sleeping irregular hours these two days. On fri night I slept at around 4am after I ot-ed until 2am. I woke up around 7pm on sat.

Yah, I sleep a lot, what's wrong with that?

On sat I went to bed at 2am, I thought I was already asleep, but around 5am I realised I was still awake.

It is either I was awake and I never realised time passes so swiftly, or I slept and woke up without realising of the process.

I woke up at 2pm today.

I had a myriad of dreams which shocked me. I awoke after each dream for a second as though to register the dream, then promptly fall back into slumber again to dream another.

Among which, I dreamt that I am dead. It doesnt feel like the previous one which I was told I am dead, in this dream, I was aware I was dead and I was continuing with living only as a spirit.

Everyone around me knows I am reduced to merely a form only but they dont seem to care. I can still talk to them, still work, and still go on with life.

I kept trying to remember how I died but I couldnt really recall, but I think I jump off a bridge of some sort.

I woke up after a while and went back to sleep again.

That dream after, I dreamt that I am in some sort of an army and this army have a mission of some sort. I was assigned a task which I realised I cant carry out because I am just a spirit.

Huh?

I thought that was a second dream?

Sigh, weird dreams these days.

Nabei Bluetooth

Still cant work.

I tried on all three free usb ports on my comp and it doesnt work, I even bought it to office to install it secretively, still cannot.

I called m1, they say I need to bring it down to the manufacturer with the official reciept, which is already long lost. The fucking bluetooth was working properly previously mah, who would continue to keep the reciept? It is not as though I thought it would be spoilt.

Tamade.

I will call the company on monday to give them a piece of my mind.


63478920/68418481/68462216
ora telecom

53 ubi cresent


And also, the website printed on the box is not valid. KNN. Can be any less suay or not? Sounds like a big conspiracy.

I am very tired!

I told esther I would write a long blog about adl on sat because I am not working this wkend. But I was doing ot until 2 a.m. just now!!!

There is no way I can write that entry tomorrow, I am hitting the sack soon and I predict I will wake up after nightfall tmr.

Esther, I will get to it, give me time.

Awww

Ø Gmailblog Ø

*Gives puppylook*

It's almost 11pm and I am STILL in office. I am very sleepy! Awww.

Pissed

I am absolutely pissed. Very bu shuang.

Sometimes I cant but to acknowledge that 我命中带屎。

A few days ago, my mouse suddenly stop working, today I went to buy a new one and it is working properly now. I meant to take a pic of it to show you all how cute my new mouse is, despite its cheap pricetag.

But my bluetooth device is spoilt.

Yah, you got it right, it is the same one I bought less than 2 months ago with my z520i. A few days ago it is still working properly, now it is signalling me that is cannot detect the device after it had been plugged in.

Damn it.

I even tried reinstalling the device. But fuckedly, it doesnt work. Nabei. $40 leh!

Actually I meant to take pics with my phone and tsf via bluetooth. I intended to take a pic of my mouse and the perlini silver bracelet that vnc gave as a christmas. I went to jurong point just now and kaypoh-ly went to check out how much the bracelet cost.

$36!!

I am shocked! That ugly unique looking bracelet cost so much! I was expecting it to be in the $20+ range, maybe $22 or so. Even mashi is surprised.

I feel bad. I may dislike the bracelet but I think I might have hurt vnc's feeling when I vehemently picked on his taste. I do hope he is not too sensitive and he is not upset despite my public display of disapproval.

Santa Claus: An Engineer's Perspective

I know it is a little late to talk about christmas, but I just got hold of this.


SANTA CLAUS: An Engineer's Perspective

I.

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population
Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per house hold, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.

II.

Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second.

This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back
up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second --- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

III.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over
500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds.

Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--Santa would need 360,000 of them.

This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

IV.

600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second crates enormous air resistance--this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop 650 mps in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's.

A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

V.

Therefore, if Santa does exist, he's dead now.

好好的

阿嬷会很好的。我相信。虽然说我是很想念她，但是如果她会到个没有病痛的地方，我再不快乐也没关系。

阿嬷现在在的那个地方，一定是个安全，美好的世界。我很希望阿嬷会一直一直的好好的。虽然可能她得离开我们身边，但我只求她会平安。一切都没关系，只要阿嬷好。

本来很伤感的，却因为想到阿嬷会很好而提醒自己不要再难过了。阿嬷如果好好的，那我们都不应该自私的想把她留在身边。

眼泪渐渐的懂得控制，情绪也要按捺住。在这几天，尤其是前几天，我的情绪完全无法控制，泪水也不由自主的落下。我在公司情绪失控，发脾气，泪流满面，晃神，狂开玩笑，闷不出声，等等等等。

我不能在家里情绪失控，因为大家突然都不堪一击。我窝囊的逃离家里，以报假的名义，离开了充满悲伤的家里。我自私的决定找个可以逃避的地点，所以选择了公司。

很不理智。

还好这几天好多了，我的情绪比较可以收敛，我也慢慢的习惯随时随地的和阿嬷讲话，只不过她没办法回应。象以前一样和她发牢骚，说同事的坏话。=)

阿嬷，你一定要好好的。我真的很想念你。

Blogging via email

I am trying this again after I stupidly enter the wrong email address to email to the first time. I hope this works so that I can blog at work without launching blogger. It is not a good idea to let the ppl at work knows that I blog, although jes already knew.

Although there is nothing offensive that cannot be shown to the people at work, I cannot say the same thing in future. =)

Spoilt Mouse

Sigh.

My mouse is spoilt. Why liddat.

0319

阿嬷走了。
12月31日的凌晨3点19分，我亲爱的阿嬷过世了。

我很想念她。