Zombiefied

Ever since I started schooling, I have been sleeping less than 5 hours on school night.

My lessons are from 7pm to 10pm, and by the time I reached home it would be 11pm. Then I'll check my emails a little, watch an episode of kangxi on youtube (hallow, give me a break, I need to de-stress leh! And I need to wait for my hair to dry anyway) and then by the time I turn in, it would be after 1am.

On non-school nights, either I am meeting up with friends or I am doing OT. Either way, it means that I'll reach home mostly after 12 midnight, and by the time I turn it, it would be 2 am.

On sat, either I go out, or I do OT, and then I'll spend my sat nights doing research for school, or read up again on the lessons (I guess my scholarly engine hadnt warm up yet. It takes much more effort for me to memorise things these days, and I forget them quickly too. Sigh).

On sun, I try to catch up on my sleep, and insert some entertainment in the form of hk drama series and stupid computer games. Then I'll continue to attempt to do my assignments, only managing to scribble 2 lines of maths working, and then a frenzy of checking maths textbook because I do not know how to proceed.

But the next 2 weeks is going to be terrible. Actually, I think we can add yesterday and today into this period of time too. Ever since I had to take over my boss's role, I am very worn out. I just realised yesterday that he had at least 80% of the information but only passed less than 20% to me. And the work we are supposed to complete? Less than 10% so. Which means the japanese designer had all the right to be angry! All the information had been passed but nothing had been completed!

I was also informed that I likely have to go on a business trip for the first 2 wks of march. And my school assignments are all due around that period of time. Which means I have to finish them within these 2 weeks as well.

On fri night I slept from 2am to 7am, and last night I slept from 1am to 2.30am, and then from 7am to 10.30am. I am getting around 5 hrs of sleep each day, and that is not enough for me. I rest my tired eyes on my way to work, standing, no less, only because the train is too packed for me to read my textbook.

I am so stressed and I am now typing away at ridiculous speed with thousands of error mistakes. Thank goodness for spellcheck function. My colleagues are asking me how come I am talking faster and faster by the hour, and everyone is stopping to look at me with new grown interest.

I joined this team not wanting to over-perform because I already know my capability and there is no need to prove it to anyone else. I told myself that I will do the work as given and then spend good attention on my school work.

And when the news were declared that I am to take over my taiwan boss, everyone was shocked. In hierachy, I am supposed to be 3rd in ranking in this team of 4, but suddenly I am taking over the lead, with my boss promising to send in another 3 person or so to aid me.

I want to do a good job, but I do not have the luxury of time now. And therefore all I can do is to continue to eat into my sleeping time. I dunno 2 weeks from now where my darkcircles would extend to, my neck I suppose, and then I will conveniently have to spend my meagre pay to buy expensive eye products to try to repair the situation.

Fuck.

Okie, 15 mins break up. I'm going back to do my Mgmt school report. Wish me good luck!