How?

I am such an indecisive person that sometimes I cant stand myself.

Like I previously posted, en'en and the rest are organising a dinner gathering this fri and I had already turned it down.

But becase I need to borrow something from slt, I was wondering whether I should still meet up for dinner with them all the same.

Otherwise it feels like a very laboured effort, make my way down there, say hi, take my stuff and say bye.

My biggest obstacle now is that I dont really want to have dinner with them. I think we will run out of topics as usual and it will be getting very uncomfortable as we all stab at our empty plates, while trying desperately to find things to talk about.

I can only endure such torturous meals for a few times, and I always need to brace myself before attending dinners with them. And this few days I am not in the mood to prepare for war and therefore I am certainly not looking forward to it.

I miss dinner with lao da and andy, where we can just crap nonstop, or I can sit back and watch they two of them in their conversation, without feeling left out myself.

I think en'en will not be happy if I say I am not turning up simply because I dont feel like going. But I dont believe in lying to them, for en'en and the bunch are still friends, and what maketh a person who lies to friends?

Sigh. How?