I decline acceptance of changes!

On my last day, nothing less.

The seat where I've been sitting at since our branched office moved back to the main office in april, the one that seat me diagonally in front of kenny, the one that seat me beside boon heng, who has been keeping me entertained with his jokes.

I will leave the seat after tomorrow, after I left the job.

Well, it used to be the plan, but even for tomorrow, on my last day, I cant sit there, for boss had gave notice for us to vacate the whole row of seats, to make room for other colleagues (who are moving back from their branched office).

I will be moving to sit at the other side of the office for my last day, and although unwillingly, I have to agree with the arrangement.

Like how boss put it, it is my last day already, just bear with it.

True la. Last day already, what more convenience can I demand? It's not like the shuffling is affecting me only, it is affecting everyone from my entire row.

I always maintain a mindset to not get attached to an office environment. It is quite a loser's thinking, in my opinion, to love a place in a company so much that a person cant bear to leave it.

In this job itself, I've shifted seats for a grand total of 5 times. To be frank, I should prefer the seat in the branched office than this one. But maybe because I am leaving this company for good, it feels very different.

Sigh, am I throwing rocks at my feet, by not quite being able to bear with leaving my seat/the company?

I would think it wasnt half as bad, if I were to shift my seat, and vacate it for the next occupant, who was supposed to appear next wk or so.

Then why the fuck must move so early!!!! One last day also cannot let me sit there?!?!? *Breathe in* *Breathe out*

But while I move to another seat, camilla will take over my p4 computer. The computer will eventually be moved to her new seat, but seems like it cannot be moved for the next few days and hence she would have to sit at my seat until the computer can be moved.

Obviously I am not happy about it, but I have to keep reminding myself that the computer doesnt belong to me in the first place, and I am going to leave the stupid computer, the stupid phone, the stupid table and the stupid chair anyway!!!!!

I feel stupid.

Why the fuck am I getting so aggitated over office furniture?

Actually it is not the office furniture la. It is the seat, the position. I guess I am just taking an easy way out to vent my anger. I am not missing the furniture, but I am hell sure I will miss crapping with boon heng and kenny and meow.

They had been the best neighbours for the 6 mths I've been sitting at this seat.

I hate to leave the colleagues but I am loving the fact I am getting out of the company. But I am in no jubilant mood regarding my new job either.

There is no doubt that I am not looking forward to work at the new job. Sure, I should be able to adapt myself, I should be able to fit in and I should be able to pass life there quietly and peacefully.

I should.

But I dowan.

Can anyone explain to me how can I earn a lot of money quickly so that I can go study!?!?

How the fuck am I supposed to save up $40k?!?!!?!?! How who the fuck would lend me that kind of money? They crazy? They out of mind? If not, how do I believe that someone would lend me the money, be it a bank or a person.

My life is really slowing down to a crawl, and soon it will be a still. Why am I stuck in a rut?