Letter: A stealer

Dear Kanigi,

How are you? Coping with life as usual?

Or coping with your anger as usual? =)

I know you are pissed about your colleague unabashedly took your matched carpet colours and passed it off as his own efforts. I know how, to a designer, important it is to find perfectly matched materials to compliment your design.

You felt that it was you who took the carpet samples from the supplier, and out of the 6 colours in the series, you are the one whom matched this two together, forming a most appropriate colour combination and contrast.

Hence it is not fair he steals your work, and reuse it repeatedly in 3 different projects. (Dont he feel bored yet? Or is the colours really that nice? Or is he plain lazy?)

He seems to be going around different projects, and announcing to everyone whom would listen, that this is going to be his signature carpet from now on.

Nothing wrong if it is really his carpet, but it is very wrong because the carpet is yours.

Poor kanigi, you say you are stuck in assisting your manager, where you dont get to select any finishes, and hence you take materials selection very seriously.

Now, dont take it to heart. You always have so little confidence in yourself, and look, what you select caught the eyes of your colleague and he is not ashamed to use it, though he is ashamed of admitting the theft.

You must have certain skills or talents to be able to get others to follow your style. Look on the bright side. If you are no good, no one will even bother.

With love,
kanigi

A message

I sat in the mrt this morning, trying to sleep despite the very lack of oxygen. While the crowd standing is feeling tired, at least they can tilt their heads upwards and swallow mouthfuls of oxygen when they need it.

For me, nose blocked and sitting down, I can barely breathe and hence I couldnt slip into lalaland fast enough. Then my hp buzzed, indicating an incoming message.

But it isnt a sms, but a note?!

Apparently someone bluetooth-ed me a note (up to this moment I dunno how that can be done) to say hi.

What the hell.

I wanted to do a search to see who was within the bluetooth vincity, but decided against it because I guess the person could be hiding his identity anyway. I replied a bye when I alight the train and moved out of his bluetooth frequency circle.

Comes an age when nothing gets me interested anymore.

Posting from laptop

I've finally gotten my laptop!!

It's a dell 640m and although it doesnt look fantastic, I am happy with its performance so far. I had been spending my whole day since this morning's delivery tweaking my preferences into this laptop.

I will be hosting all my songs on this lappy from now on, and I will find time to save all my cds' songs too.

Meanwhile, all I can say is that I am ABSOLUTELY proud to have set up the internet connection! =) I am now in my own room, blogging this entry while lying on my stomach. Loving the privacy and the period of solitude.

Shrinking responsibilites?

I got into a near arguement with a colleague a moment ago, and I was irked with the look in his eyes, like I am shrinking responsibilities when we must be shouldering the responsibilites together.

Technically it is correct, but I cant help but to think that it is hardly my fault that the error occured, and it was only realised only at this point.

We had needed sets of fabric walls for a customer, and the according to this colleague 1 month ago, the vendor who is building these special walls for us will be the one purchasing the specific fabrics.

Then 1 month later, yesterday morning, this colleague asked me whether I had purchased the fabric for the specialist walls, and of course I said no, he was the one who said the specialist will buy it.

Now the fabric is out of stock.

The client had already confirmed on the fabric and now I cant find anything similar at all.

This colleague wanted us to tell the client that it was out of stock, simple as that, but to me, it is hardly the case. There had been some sever cockups, mostly due to the client's indecisiveness and also because I took it for granted that my colleagues will tell me when things go wrong, but they didnt.

I really have to remind myself to trust only myself. But sigh, if I keep doing everything myself, or keep reminding my colleagues, people say I am not a team player and I dont trust my colleagues. Fuck.

Anyway, I cant help but to think we might be able to get the stock if he had remembered to tell the specialist 1 month ago.

Sigh.

Irritated like hell

My mother is telling me my auntie (her younger sister) told her that one can go to the WDA website to sign up for subsidised comp courses, and the offer will end by end of this month.

I went to WDA website a few days ago as requested by my mother, and there's just nothing much there, except some corporation profile, as well as million of words with almost no proper paragraphing and no heading.

So I was on the line with my auntie and her daughter, and they kept telling me to find the 'computer' page on the main page.

No, it isnt there.

I explain it is not there, but there's only some links to go to the profile and etc.

"Oh, go to the main page." They say.

I was on the main page! There's nothing that says 'computer' that I can see, so I ctrl-f. No luck.

"Oh, go to the main page." They repeat.

I was quite sure it is embedded in one of those links, but I am not going to go clicking them one by one by one by one. I need to know the exact path. But where?

"Oh, go to the main page." They suggest.

I decided that it must be at WDA homepage> WDA Programmes > For Individual, and I clicked in. The stupid address reads "..../jobseekers" Tells a lot about the webpage designer no? Isnt it basic webdesign knowledge that you have to label you links and pages coherently?

No meh? Huh? Huh? Huh?!

Ctrl-f again for 'computer'. Not matched.

I literally begged that they read out the address of that page to me so that I can direct hit in.

"Oh, go to the main page." They droned.

I suddenly decided that to have my sanity intact, I have quickly end the call. I desperately kept the edge in my tone under control, and told them I will just tell my mother I cant find the page, and thanked them for their help.

The moment I hang up the call, I began swearing out loud.

I cant stand it!!

Learnt a new thing today

I've learnt a new thing today.

Which is, when people tell you something with conviction, it maybe be simply because he and yourself is talking about totally different things.

I needed small hinges for my project and I was told there isnt anything like that. I thought to myself that it is not possible because I've seen them before somewhere!

People keep telling me there's no hinges that is so small and I should believe him because he is in the trade for ages.

But at the same time, I am very bewildered because I am certain I've seen them before.

It turns out that we are talking about different things altogether.

I was talking about this :






And he was talking about this :











To make sure I know what I am talking about, I actually went to the hardware shop and asked to see the hinges they have, and now I know there's hinges as small as 1" tall. =)


Little wonder why we couldnt come to a conclusion. To me hinges all look this way, and I didnt know there's different kind of hinges.

Hahaha. Learnt something new today.

Learning to be less responsible

The past two days had past by leaving me feeling relaxed and happy. Most of the time I was just sitting around doing nothing much, though I still had a few outstanding issues from the 3 projects that I am handing.

The key point to having time to relax is that, if no one else is going to be worried about anything, then I dont need to be the one stressing over them.

If no one else cares, neither should I.

Honestly, I am sick of being the one chasing to tie all loose ends, while the rest of them simply let go of their hands and let the loose ends fall freely, swinging in the breeze caused by them when they dash away.

I shouldnt be the stupid one making myself pissed off while the rest of them worked diligently towards me being pissed off. Sometimes tables should turn and I shall let them find themselves suddenly in limlight from the mess they cultivated.

At a place where no matter how much I do I still stay unappreciated, I think I sooner survive if I begin to let go of these strenuous burdens.

Paint it purple? But it already is!

You Should Paint Your Room Purple

Sophisticated and exotic, purple can also be a deeply comforting color. Your purple room will inspire you to trust yourself more and go with your intuition. Purple has also been known to facilitate healing and a feeling of protection.

What Color Should You Paint Your Room?

Silly me

When I slapped the snooze button this morning like I do every morning, I was going to drop back to sleep for a couple more minutes when I suddenly smelt a very unfamiliar scent, very very nearby, almost like beside my nose.

Almost immediately, I cowered under by blanket, quite awake suddenly.

3 seconds later, I slap my forehead and realised, THAT WAS JUST THE NEW SHAMPOO!

I changed shampoo the night before and I smelt my own hair when I wormed around in bed trying to hit the snooze button without moving too much of myself around.

Sometimes I am going to drive myself nuts with my nonsensical thinking.

Proud of myself

After a long and tedious battle of wits with my client, I am supremely pleased to announce that he had finally confirmed 90% of the outstanding items, and the remaining 10% will not affect the handover even if we delay it a little while more.

It hadnt been easy and I was utterly worried that today's meeting would rendered a waste of time again, and the queasy feeling accumulated when I started to go through the drawings and he cannot remember half of the things that were spoke about just last wed, during the marathon meeting from 10.30am to 6pm.

But when he started to sign the first piece of drawing, though painfully scruntinising the drawing to ensure I drew in everything as promised (I still missed out something, in case you want to ask, haha), I was so happy that I did an imaginary fists-punch-air-above-head.

Things will get better. It really will. I am beginning to remember to breathe already. =)

And of course the marathon meeting for 7.5 hours had been punishing and quite result-disappointing, but without that meeting, today's meeting wont go as smoothly. So far, a lot of the things I've done for this client had went to waste, but at least that long meeting had been justified a little.

And hopefully that while they dont show it, they are very happy with me. =)

Poor behaviour

I went to the movies yesterday, watching Just Follow Law. A humourous show, I must say, and I enjoyed Fann's goofy expressions. Hahah.

The night didnt end on a high note though. I got into a small arguement with the strangers sitting next to me.

The show had ended and it was almost 11:30pm. Everyone was beginning to file out of the theatre while the two person sitting to my left was still sitting. My friend gestured me to get going, but I explained that the two were not budging yet.

I guess they were waiting to see if there's any interesting parts after the scrolling credits but I wasnt that eager. I just want to get out and dash in the direction of the toilet, cos it is never my habit to trouble fellow movie-goers to tuck their legs in for me.

So we waited for a while, and everyone to my right was already looking at the two of them, wondering how come they hadnt move. (I was at vivo, and the stairs are down the two sides, with around 30 seats in the entire row. I was at seat 6.)

You might already know how I am used to be taking the lead so that things get done, and hence in this scenario, after waiting for like 1 whole embarrassing minute (the two were pretending the rest of us arent there I think), I stood up and motioned my friend.

I stood still for a couple of second, cos I seem to have a small case of nightblindness. I spoke "Excuse me" and then began to walk.

I walked past seat 5, and then started to walk by seat 4. But should luck have it, I stepped on her leg with my heels.

OUCH!

I immediately stopped, and everyone behind me almost crashed into me. I quickly apologised and stopped for a moment to see if she was ok.

She, an auntie of almost 50 years old, started to complain that it hurts.

I apologised again, and the woman beside her, supposedly her daughter, around 30 years old or so, started to alternate between showing concern to the older woman, and shooting deadly stares at me.

Then the older woman started to raise her leg and started rubbing it, and I was already turning red. I apologised again and explained I didnt see her leg (that was sticking out) and hence the accident.

She wasnt going to let me off, and everyone behind me was stuck in line. She started whining on how much it hurts and question why had I step on her feet.

Upon then, my embarrassment turned quickly into rage. I mean hallo! I had already apologised repeatedly, and it was totally unintentional, can she give me a break?

I guessed my irritation started to show on my face, and the duo was making more noise than ever, as though wanting me to make some sort of compensation.

"Eh! I already said I am sorry, what do you want?" I snapped.

My friend apparently heard me loud and clear, and he began to push me on, trying to get me to flee the scene.

The duo continued to mumble some unintelligent lines, and I returned "Show over already still sit there FOR WHAT!"

(In times like such, my level of english language always dropped to a new low.)

With my friend ushering me out, I was quickly pushed out of view of the duo, and I started to calm down a little. He asked me what had actually happened, and I complained again that I've already said excuse me, and it is not as if she didnt see us all standing up. She can sit there and wait if she want, but at least tuck her legs in what.

In retrospect, I think the duo were quite fortunate. If I was still within their hearing range, I will definately add on another few lines after my "Show over already still sit there FOR WHAT (deadpanned with emphasis), such as "Waiting to pick up the leftover popcorns to bring home issit?" or "Waiting to sweep the theatre?"

I was so irritated after that I didnt want to go anywhere else already. I cant believe the two of them are so petty. I already apologised (with genuine frown of concern written all over my face) initially but they are so unforgiving.

I know it hurts, but who asked them to sit there even after the show is over, and who asked her not to tuck her leg in?

Now all I can say is "Orh bi!"